A new start, an old dream and a past love
by PLLiar
Summary: The story isn't with the PLL characters, but it is with the actresses! It's a story about a girl, Saywer, who's working towards her dream job and on that path she bumbs into her old flame who happens to be one of the actresses who plays in Pretty little liars.
1. Chapter 1

Late in the evening and Sawyer was reading her favorite clause of her favorite Dickens book, _Great expectations_: 'I loved her against reason, against promise, against peace, against hope, against happiness, against all discouragement that could be.'  
>Every time she read that part her mind took her to that special person and this time was not different. Thinking, fantasizing, hoping, …<p>

Phoebes thoughts got interrupted by her cellphone that started ringing. No caller ID. She wasn't really in the mood to pick up her phone but she did it anyway.  
>"Hello."<br>"Hi, I'm calling for miss Sawyer Brookes."  
>"You're speaking with her."<br>"Oh, hi miss Brookes. I'm calling for the job interview you had last week here at Hollywood records. We would like you to come in for a second interview. Can you come in tomorrow at 9.30am?"  
>"yes, no problem. Thank you."<br>They both hang up.  
>Sawyer couldn't believe it. She was one of five people from dozens who got chosen for a second interview. It was her dream to work for a famous record label and she was just one interview away from that dream. Immediately her mind started to run through her wardrobe. What would she wear? It had to be classy and trendy, but she still needed be herself. She'd definitively wear a long skinny jeans, probably a dark blue one. Shoes weren't so difficult to choose either, her black sneakers were perfect and very easy to match everything. About accessories she needed to think a little but she quickly decided to wear her triquetra necklace, a very standard watch and her two favorite leather bracelets. One she got for her birthday a couple years ago from her best friend and the other she got from her… She interrupted her own thoughts and walked into her bedroom towards her closet. Now she only needed to decide which T-shirt she would wear. After ten minutes just staring into her closet she gave up and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth.<br>" I'll find something tomorrow," she thought.  
>Sawyer changed into her purple checkered pajama pants and a white thank top and tossed her clothes on a chair next to her closet. She stepped into her queen-size bed, turned out her night light and went to sleep. All though it took her a while to fall asleep.<p>

07.30am and Sawyers alarm clock started singing 'Vacation' by Simple plan. Sawyer search for her cellphone with her eyes closed and put it off. Slowly she sat herself straight and opened her eyes. It always takes her a minute or two before her brain starts kicking in.  
>"Okay, time to wake up now Sawyer" she said to herself and with that phrase she threw her legs out of bed and stood up. She opened her half long green black striped curtains. The sun stood on the other side of the building in the morning so she saw the big, long shadows from the buildings around. She walked to her closet and stared at it like last night. This time she took a shirt out. It was a white loose shirt that was wide on the shoulders and it had some color changes near the bottom of the shirt. She started to put her jeans on and remembered her only white bra was still lying in the laundry basket.<br>"Damn it."  
>She walked out of her room and knocked the door down the hall. She opened it and stuck her head through the opening.<br>"Hey, Caillee. Can I borrow one of your white bra's?"  
>Caillee was Sawyers roommate. They met at Los Angeles College of Music where they shared a dorm room at the campus of their school. When Caillee and Sawyer both graduated 3 years ago they were determined to find a place they could share and they were lucky enough to have find that place. It wasn't like either of them had a fixed relationship.<br>Sawyer, who was still hanging half way through the open door, didn't get a response from her roommate.  
>"Caillee," she spoke a little louder.<br>"Heu, what, where…?" Caillee woke up confused.  
>"Can I borrow one of your white bra's," Sawyer repeated, "mine is still in the laundry basket."<br>"Yeah, sure. Take one out of my closet."  
>Sawyer entered the room, stepping barefoot on the fluffy pink matt. Her roommate loved pink but because Sawyer wasn't so crazy about the color, they agreed to not put any pink in the common rooms.<br>Sawyer opened the drawer where Caillee kept her underpants and her bra's. She grabbed a white bra and closed the drawer again. On her toes she left the room because Caillee had fallen asleep already and Sawyer didn't wanted to wake her again.  
>She quickly put on the bra and her shirt she picked out and went into the bathroom to brush her hair.<br>"Loose or ponytail?"  
>A Loose ponytail. Sawyer didn't have very long hair but just long enough to make a loose ponytail so her hair would stay out of her face a little. She put on her accessories and done.<p>

Now she was finished with her clothing, she could eat some breakfast. She took a bowl out of the kitchen cabinet and a spoon out of a drawer. She picked up the box of cheerios and let them fall into her bowl. After putting the box away again she picked the strawberry drinking yoghurt out of the refrigerator and poured it over her cereals.

At 8.20am she finished her breakfast and decided to leave already. It was just a half hour drive to Hollywood records but she was sure she could use the extra time. It was always very crowded on the road this hour in the morning and she wouldn't want to be late at her job interview. So she got her keys, locked the door behind her and went to the place where she parked her car yesterday. And off she went, on the way to her big dream.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Sawyer arrived at the Hollywood records at 9.05am. She had a lot of luck on the road because for some reason there wasn't as much traffic as normal. Walking towards the big round building, she ran over some answers she had prepared. In all her concentration she didn't even noticed she walked past Lucy Hale, the actress who plays Aria Montgomery in Pretty little liars, a TV show Sawyer loved to watch. But Saywer also loved Lucy Hales first single she just brought out two days ago.  
>They both walked through the revolving door at the front of the building. Sawyer walked towards the front desk to register herself and Lucy walk further into the building. The receptionist told Sawyer to go upstairs to the third floor and wait in the hallway at room 314. Saywer started walking to the elevators. "No stairs today," she thought. She wouldn't like to go in to the interview all sweaty. Waiting for the elevator she looked at her left and finally recognized the PLL actress who was waiting right next to her for the elevator to come down.<br>"OMG, you're Lucy Hale! I'm sorry to be so… Pretty little liars is one my favorite TV shows."  
>"That's nice to hear, it's always fun to meet a fan."<br>"I also like your new single very much. It just keeps hanging around in my head."  
>"Thank you, that's very sweet of you."<p>

Ding. The elevator doors went open and they both stepped in.

"Which floor?" Lucy asked.  
>"Euhm, third please," Sawyer answered.<br>Sawyer saw that Lucy didn't press another number, so she probably needed to be at the same floor.  
>"So are you new here? I haven't seen you around."<br>"Well hopefully soon I will be. I'm here for a job interview."  
>"Oh and for which job are you here?"<br>"Assistant producer. For a new upcoming singer."

Ding. The elevator doors opened again and they both stepped out of the elevator.

"Oh yeah, I heard about that. Isn't today like the second round with only five people?"  
>"Yeah. Today we have another talk and we also need to do practical test or something."<br>They passed room 314 with on the opposite of the door a couple dark brown chairs with a flower printed pillow.  
>"Well this is where I need to be" said Sawyer: "It was very nice to meet you."<br>"You too. And good luck."  
>"Thank you."<br>Lucy continued walking through the long hall and went in a room a couple doors further.  
>After this meeting, Sawyer needed to get her mind straight again. She couldn't go in with a dreamy head because than it would look like she couldn't handle to meet famous people on a daily basis. She needed to stay professionally and stay focused.<p>

The door in front of Sawyer opened.  
>"Miss Brookes?"<br>Sawyer looked up. A man in his forties stood in the opening of the door.  
>"Yes," Sawyer answered.<br>"Come in please."  
>Sawyer stood up and walked past the man who kept the door open for her. In the office stood a desk with three chairs behind it, two of them were filled with a young men and an older men. On the other side of the desk there only stood one chair and she assumed that chair was meant for her. She assumed right, the men who invited her in, pointed her to the single chair. He himself took place on the other side next to the other two men. And now her second interview could start.<p>

After ten minutes telling about her experiences and another ten minutes answering questions, the interview was finally over. Sawyer could take a breath again. But just for a couple minutes. In a quarter of an hour she needed to be on the second floor for a practical test. So she took the elevator down to the second floor, search for studio B and knocked on the door. A young man opened the door. He wore an old looking jeans, a T-shirt from the cure and his hair was sticking up with gel.  
>"Can I help you?" the man asked.<br>"Euhm yeah, I'm supposed be here for a practical test for my job interview. Mr. Cambell has send me down." Mr. Cambell was the man, who invited her in, upstairs.  
>"Right. So you're miss Brookes? Come on in."<br>"Thank you" Sawyer stepped into the room: "I know I'm a little early."  
>"No problem. It's better to be too early than too late."<br>Sawyer smiled at the guy. He was fun, relaxed. Sawyer looked around and put big eyes on. For a second she thought she was in heaven. In front of her she saw a huge mixing desk. At home she had one too but this one was ten times bigger. She couldn't believe her eyes.  
>"You like it?" the man asked. He had noticed her big eyes.<br>All Sawyer could bring out was: "Uhu."  
>In front of the mixing desk was a window and behind that window there was the recording booth with a grand piano, a couple guitars and in the middle stood a recording microphone.<br>"Oh…my god. This is amazing!" Sawyer almost shouted.  
>"Yeah it's pretty great" said the guy while looking around: "So euhm we still need to wait for a couple people before we can start with your test. I have to go get something quickly but you're welcome to wait here."<br>"Thank you, Mr. …?"  
>"Oh sorry. Call me TJ."<br>"Nice to meet you TJ, I'm Sawyer."  
>They shook hands. After letting go, TJ walked out of the room. Sawyer twirled around and thought: "I'm gonna love it here."<p>

15 minutes later.

"Okay miss Brookes, show us what you got, " Mr. Cambell gave her a go-ahead. Looking at her, were the same three people from upstairs in the interview room plus TJ, the guy who had invited her into the studio. Sawyer was ready to begin. She needed to show her public how well she could use the mixing desk. So that's why she would only use the most necessary parts on the panel and if they asked why she didn't use everything else, she would tell them what one of her teachers always said: _The best producers can do the most with a small des._ And if that wasn't enough to convince her judges, she would just show them what she could do with all the rest. Sawyer was ready to push up the first sliders when the door of the studio swung open.

"Sorry, I'm late. Hope I didn't miss anything."  
>It was Lucy Hale who came rushing through the door. Sawyer turned around and the only thing she could do was staring open-eyed to the girl she had met earlier that morning.<br>"No not at all. Miss Brookes was just getting started," said the older man next to Mr. Cambell.  
>The eyes of Lucy and Sawyer crossed each other when Lucy took place on a chair next to TJ.<br>"Well don't let me hold you up any longer miss Brookes," Lucy said.  
>"Euhm…right." Sawyer shook her head to get her concentration back and turned herself back at the mixing desk. There she went.<br>Sawyer was able to entertain her judges for almost 20 minutes with just her own mixing talent. When she finished up her last sounds, Lucy asked: "Hey can we maybe do something together?"  
>"Sure. What would you like to do?" Sawyer asked.<br>"I'm working on a new song but TJ here isn't really finding the right tunes for me. We have a little something but it's just nog working yet. I'd just like to hear what you would do with it."  
>"Okay, sounds good."<br>Lucy opened the door next to the mixing desk to step into the recording booth, she took place behind the mike and put on the headphone hanging under it. TJ put on the track and from the minute the music started playing and Lucy started singing, Sawyer just lost herself in the music. She twisted, pushed and pulled different buttons up and down, left and right. She wasn't even aware from her surroundings. TJ had pushed the record button and the three other men were moving along with the music.  
>When Lucy ended with her last notes, Sawyer followed her by slowly put the music to mute. Lucy came out of the booth: "Omg, that was amazing! I loved it!"<br>The two girls smiled to each other. Now Sawyer turned to her judges and gave them a questioning look.  
>"Well I think Lucy knows who she wants to have as her new assistant producer," TJ said laughing.<br>That's when it hit Sawyer. They were searching for someone to work with Lucy Hale. Sawyer knew she'd work with a upcoming singer but it never crossed her mind it could be Lucy.  
>"We'll still need to discuss this a little so you'll hear something from us next week. Thank you for coming in," Mr. Cambell said.<br>Sawyer shook his hand. After him, she shook everyone else's hand and ended with Lucy. The country singer winked at her. Sawyer walked back to her car with the feeling of happiness spread through her whole body.

One week later.

Finally Sawyer got that call, she had been waiting for all week.  
>"Miss Sawyer," it was Mr. Cambell calling: "I'll be expecting you on Monday at 8am in my office. Congratulations with your new job."<br>"Thank you very much."

After hanging up, Sawyer screamed of joy and jumped through her apartment. Caillee, who was just finishing up after her shower, ran out of the bathroom with just a bath towel around her.  
>"What's going on? Is there a fire?" she asked with a little bit of panic in her voice.<br>Sawyer stopped jumping and looked at her roommate with a big excited smirk on her face:  
>"I've got the job!"<br>"Really?!"  
>"Yeah, I start Monday!"<br>"Omg, this is just amazing! Congratulations!"  
>Now the two girls were dancing around the living room together, screaming and laughing. Suddenly Sawyer stopped and looked at Caillee with another smirk, but a different one like before.<br>Caillee stopped too. "What?" she asked.  
>"Euhm,…" Sawyer looked a little down and quickly turned her eyes away: "Your towel fell down."<br>Now Caillee looked down too: "Oh great."  
>Caille quickly took her towel from the ground and ran back to the bathroom with Sawyer laughing behind her.<br>"Nothing to see here," she said before closing the bathroom door.  
>Sawyer threw her eyes to the ceiling and let herself fall back over the end of the sofa that stood just behind her. Lying there looking at the ceiling, her smile just grew bigger.<br>"YES, I GOT IT!" she screamed out.  
>It was just the start of her big dream and she couldn't wait to see what was next on her path of this amazing journey.<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

It was three months after Sawyer got her dream job, producing and recording music with a talented singer. Sawyer thought she even got luckier to work with Lucy Hale. A young upcoming singer/songwriter, who also played in one of Sawyers favorite TV-shows, Pretty little liars.  
>Sawyer stood behind the mixing desk in studio B, together with TJ. She was looking at Lucy, who was standing in the recording booth behind the microphone.<br>"Well, I guess I shoulda learned how to lie a little better" Lucy sang, the last sentence of her song.  
>TJ pushed the last buttons down and Sawyer ended the recording. They both took their headphones of their ears and sat down on the office chairs that stood right behind them. Lucy walked through de door from the recording booth to the studio and let herself fall down on the black leather couch.<br>"Oooh, I'm so tired." Lucy said: "What time is it?"  
>"It's 7.45pm" TJ said, looking at the clock on the computer screen.<br>"Oh god. And we still need to finish that last song. Does it have to be today?"  
>"I think we need to reload our energy," Sawyer said: "Shall I order some Chinese?"<br>"Yes please," the two others said in sinc.  
>"The usual?"<br>"Yeah, but can you ask for some extra mini spring rolls?" Lucy asked.  
>"Sure."<br>Sawyer searched for her cellphone in her jacket, took it out of the inside pocket and dialed the number of the Chinese restaurant.

30 minutes later their order arrived.  
>TJ took the box from the delivery boy, paid him and gave the boy a good tip.<br>"I'm starving," TJ said and opened his box of noodles with big shrimp.  
>Sawyer picked out her box with baked rice and fried chicken and poured some sweet and sour sauce over her dinner. Lucy started with a mini spring roll, which she dipped in the slightly spicy curry sauce.<br>"Okay," TJ started speaking to Lucy: "We just need to record your bonus track and then we're finished for tonight. And then tomorrow Sawyer and I can start finishing you album."  
>"I just can't believe that it's almost done," Lucy replied.<br>"Believe it girl. You better start thinking how you want to have your releasing party," TJ said with a push from his foot to her leg.  
>"I must say, I didn't think that it would go so fast either," Sawyer hurled herself into their conversation.<br>Lucy turned to Sawyer: "I know, right."  
>They smiled to each other.<br>"So, have you thought about the kind of party you want when your release your album?" Sawyer asked.  
>"To be honest, I haven't really thought about it. I don't know, does there really need be a theme or something?"<br>"Some singers like it to stay in the theme of their music." TJ answered.  
>"I think I just want a regular party with everyone who helped me making my album, my friends, my family,… And some cute guys couldn't hurt either."<br>They all started laughing and ended with a big sigh.  
>"Come on. Let's start recording that last song so we don't need to stay here 'till midnight" TJ said while setting his dinner down on the table. He stood up and started setting everything right for their next and hopefully last recording. TJ looked over his shoulder to the two girls who were still sitting down with their dinner in their hands.<br>"Let's go girls." he said, trying to get them on their feet again. Sawyer and Lucy giggled and stood up. They walked to their places, put on their headphones and they were ready to go. Sawyer pushed the button to start the music while in her mind she encouraged herself for going on just a little longer and not to fall a asleep.

At 11.10pm, Sawyer put her key in the door lock of her apartment. When she opened the door, Caillee turned her head from the TV to her.  
>"Wow, you look very tired, like you haven't slept for days." Caillee said with a shocked face. She immediately stood up from the couch and walked towards Sawyer, who let out a bit sigh: "Heu… I feel like crap. I just wanne go to bed and sleep for a whole week."<br>"Man, this job really takes every energy you've got. Are you sure this is your dream job?"  
>"As tired as I am…Yeah, I love it" Sawyer smiled to Caillee: "But I'm going to sleep now. I have to get up early again tomorrow. We're gonna start finishing up the album, which means this was definitely not my last long day. Goodnight."<br>Sawyer walked towards the hallway.  
>"Sweet dreams" Caillee said before Sawyer walked into the hallway.<br>Caillee got startled by a hard blow.  
>"Everything okay there?" she asked her roommate.<br>"Yeah. I just forgot that my bedroom was on the left side of the hall and not on the right" Sawyer answered.  
>Sawyer finally got safely in bed and fell asleep.<p>

The following three days, TJ and Sawyer were busy, every minute of the day, trying to finish up Lucy's album. But then came Sunday and they all had a day off, including Lucy. She didn't even have to go the set of Pretty little liars, and that didn't happen very often.

It was Sunday morning, around ten o'clock and Sawyer just got out of bed. It felt good to have nice long sleep after such a long time. Her roommate was already in the kitchen making breakfast for herself.  
>"Do you want some cereal too?" Caillee asked.<br>"Yes, please."  
>Together they took place on the couch in front of the TV, each with a big bowl of cereal and a spoon in their hands. Sawyer just put a spoon full of cereal in her mouth when her phone rang. Looking at the display of her cellphone, she saw it was Lucy calling. The phone rang a couple times before Sawyer could swallow the food and pick up her phone.<br>"Hi Lucy," Sawyer said, answering the call.  
>"Hey Sawyer. Are you busy tonight?" Lucy replied.<br>"No, I don't think so. Why?"  
>"I was wondering if would like to come over later. I invited some friends from the set and I'd like you to come too. If you want to. We're just gonna hang out and maybe play some games."<br>"Euhm, yeah. Sounds fun. At what time should I be at your place?"  
>"Around 7pm is fine."<p>

"Okay, see you tonight."  
>"Yeah. Bye."<p>

After Sawyer put down her phone, she told Caillee what her plans were for that night.  
>"Oh that's okay. Now I can invite my special friend over," was Caillees response.<br>"Who is it this time?" Sawyer asked.  
>"Eric. I met him at the coffee shop."<br>Caillee was still playful when it came to relationships. She didn't really had the need to have a steady one. So it happened that Sawyer woke in the morning and met a new guy who was standing in the kitchen in his boxers. In the beginning it was very uncomfortable for Sawyer but after all these years she got used to the adventurous character of her roommate.  
>They both laughed.<br>"So, do you think...you know… Is she gonna be there?" Caillee asked.  
>"I don't know. I guess I'll have to wait and see."<br>"How long has it been?"  
>"In a week, seven years and six months."<br>"Woow. Do you think you're ready to see her again?"  
>"I don't know. I really don't."<p>

A couple minutes after 7pm, Sawyer rang the doorbell at Lucy's house. She didn't have to wait long for Lucy to open up. She looked happy and fresh. She clearly had caught up some sleep too.  
>"Hi, come on in" Lucy greeted Sawyer.<br>Sawyer walked through the door and closed the door behind her. She followed Lucy into the living room where everyone was sitting convivial together.  
>"Hey everyone," Lucy tried to get their attention: "this is my assistant producer and a new good friend, Sawyer."<br>Sawyer looked around the room and sighed relieved. She wasn't here.  
>Lucy continued with her introducing: "Sawyer, this Ian, Shay, Ashley, Keegan, Tyler and Troian."<br>"Hi," Sawyer said with a little bit of a nervous sound in her voice: "it's nice to meet you all."  
>And she gave everyone a quick handshake.<br>The first one to approach her more closely, was Troian: "So you're the famous person who is helping our goose."  
>"Yeah, I guess so" Sawyer responded while her mind was processing what Troian exactly said: "Wait did you just say goose?"<br>Everybody started laughing except Sawyer who was kind of confused.  
>"That's our nickname for our little one," Ashley explained.<br>When everybody settled down, Lucy told Sawyer where she could find what: "Okay, so drinks are in the fridge and there our snacks on the table. Later we'll get the deserts out too. And euhm… Oh, the bathroom is down the hall. If there's still something you can't find, just ask. Okay?"  
>"Yeah, thanks."<br>"Hey Sawyer do you want an aperitif?" It was Ian who asked her.  
>"No thanks."<br>"Something else than?"  
>"Ice tea, please."<br>"Sure, coming right up."

The doorbell rang again.  
>"Ooh, I think our last guest is here" Lucy said while standing up from her chair and walking towards the front door.<br>"Who's the last guest?" Sawyer asked Troian, who was sitting next to her.  
>"Lindsey." Troian replied.<br>Sawyers heart started to beat faster with every beat. Her hands got sweaty and her stomach suddenly felt like it got tangled up. She heard Lucy in the hallway greeting Lindsey and inviting her to come in. Both Lucy and Lindsey walked into the living room. Sawyer stood up from her place on the couch because she knew Lucy wanted to introduce her to Lindsey, not knowing it wasn't really necessary. The only thing that prevented Sawyer from seeing Lindsey at the moment was Shay who was standing right between them. But after Shay said 'hi' to Lindsey, she sat back down on the chair beside the sofa. And then their eyes met again after 7 years and 6 months.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Sawyer looked right into Lindsey's very surprised eyes. Both girls stood there just staring. In the background, Sawyer heard Lucy introducing both of them to each other.  
>"This is Lindsey," Lucy spoke to Sawyer. "Lindsey this is my assistant producer and new friend, …"<br>"Sawyer" Lindsey finished Lucy's sentence.  
>"Yeah, wait you know each other?" Lucy asked surprised.<br>It took a while for Lindsey to answer.  
>"Euhm, yeah. We…euhm we…" Lindsey was really confused.<br>"We were in high school together" Sawyer answered instead.  
>"Oh really? That's awesome," Lucy said: "Well Lindsey, find yourself a seat somewhere. Can I get you a drink? An aperitif maybe?"<br>"Euhm, yeah sure." Lindsey answered.  
>"Well…, what kind of aperitif do you want?"<br>Lindsey was really distracted and surprised by seeing Sawyer so she wasn't really thinking clear: "Oh sorry…Euhm…" Lindsey cleared her throat by producing a soft cough: "I'll take what Shay's having."  
>Shay was holding a high narrow glass with a red looking aperitif with bubbles in it. It was cava with crème de cassis and looking around the other girls were all drinking the same thing, accept Sawyer.<br>Lindsey sat herself down in between Shay and Keegan across from Sawyer. Everybody was buzzy talking about this and that, accept Sawyer and Lindsey. They exchanged quick glances without anyone noticing. Their series of glances were interrupted by Lucy, who gave Lindsey her drink. Lindsey thanked Lucy and took a big gulp from her glass.  
>"Wow, take it easy Linds. You don't wanne get drunk already, do you?" Shay said to her friend and co-star. Lindsey smiled awkward to Shay and then looked more seriously but still awkward to Sawyer, who was looking right back at her.<p>

At 9.20pm Tyler suggested to play a game that Ashley had brought. It was a classic party game with all these questions about relationships, your childhood, sex and other stuff. Ashley put the box on the coffee table and the once who weren't sitting down yet took a seat.  
>"So," Ashley begun: "it's really easy. We take turns drawing a card. The person who draws the card may choose who'll need to answer. When you really don't want to answer you need to drink a shot instead, but we each get just three shots. After your three shot are up, you will HAVE to answer. Any questions?"<br>"Yeah," Sawyer said with one hand half raised in the air: "Is there a substitution for drinking a shot?"  
>"Yeah, answering the question." It was Tyler who gave the 'smart' comment.<br>Everybody laughed.  
>"No, I mean something none alcoholic?"<br>"Why?" Ashley asked: "Are you allergic or something?"  
>"Or something," Sawyer said: "I'm actually not allowed to drink alcoholic, doctors others."<br>Sawyer was stared at with some questioning looks. It was Troian who came up with a substitution drink, a mix of a coke, lemonade, ice tea and some cinnamon. Not the most tasteful drink but at least better than alcohol, Sawyer thought.  
>Ashley gave the go-ahead and the first one to draw a card was Keegan, who read the card out loud: "First kiss, when, where and with who."<br>"Who'll need to answer?" Troian asked.  
>"Well I'm not gonna pick you, Troian, because I already know the answer" Keegan replied and looked around the circle searching for someone who he wanted and answer from: "Okay Ian, tell us, where and when was your first kiss and with who?"<br>Ian, who was sitting two seats away from Keegan, looked at his friend and started thinking: "Euhm…I think it was eight grade behind the gym lockers with Alice Johnson, who was two years older."  
>Ian said it in a very boastful way and with two fingers up as a peace sign.<br>"Okay, you don't have to brag about it" Lucy said with a punch against his arm. Everybody laughed.  
>"Okay. That was an easy question, be prepared for some more intimate questions" Ashley said with a big grin on her face.<br>The next one to draw a card was Lucy, she drew one and read it out loud: "Who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Okay, I know the answer from everyone here, accept you Sawyer. Tell us who was your first boyfriend?"  
>All eyes turned towards Sawyer.<br>"I've never had a boyfriend" Sawyer replied with a simple gesture of her hands.  
>"No way, you're 25 and you've never had a boyfriend?" Lucy asked with a lot of disbelief.<br>"No, never" Sawyer had a small grin on her face that gave her away.  
>"Wait a minute," it was Troian who got the message first: "who was your first girlfriend?"<br>"Now that I can answer, sort of."  
>For the umpteenth time that night, everybody laughed.<br>"Well, come on, tell us."  
>"I can't give you a name, 'cause I promised the girl I'd never tell anybody about us. She wasn't really comfortable with her feelings for me."<br>A quick glance to the opposite of the circle.  
>"But I can tell you that she was beautiful, kind, smart…And when nobody was around, she was the most loving person I've ever known."<br>This time she got a quick glance from the opposite of the circle.  
>"Why didn't it work out?" Troian asked.<br>"She was scared of her feelings. She didn't want anybody to know about us. For me it was like a step back 'cause I already came out, but she wasn't ready yet. I had a big talk with her one day, because I wanted to tell my parents about us, but she was too scared. The next day I got a letter that she didn't wanted to hold me up and broke up with me. At the end of the school year she graduated and moved away."  
>Now two pair of eyes met each other and they were locked for 5 full seconds. Still nobody had noticed.<br>"Wooow, that's sad" was Lucy's reaction: "When did you date this girl?"  
>"High school, I was 17 and she was 18. We went to school together."<br>"Well it's her loss." Lucy said.  
>"Okay enough about my sad love live, next card please."<br>The rest of the evening was passed with dessert and questions. When they got through the whole stack of question cards, they all sat back in their seats with a drink.  
>Lindsey stood up: "I'm gonna take some more dessert. Anybody want something?"<br>"Yeah, but I'll come with you. I need to stretch my legs" Shay said.  
>The two girls walked into the kitchen. When they stood at the table with the selection of desserts, Shay directed herself towards Lindsey.<br>"Hey, you were in high school together with Sawyer, right?"  
>"Yeah."<br>"So do you know the mysterious girl, Sawyer was talking about earlier?"  
>"Euhm…I don't think so."<br>"You were the same age as the secret girlfriend, nobody you know that moved away after your graduation?"  
>"Yeah lots of people, for college, but nobody in particular."<br>Lindsey was trying her best to dodge anymore questions and that hadn't escaped Shay.  
>Sawyer walked into the room and stopped when she just passed through the door frame: "Sorry. Am I interrupting something?"<br>"No, we were just talking" Lindsey replied and took her plate full of dessert and walked past Sawyer to leave the kitchen, not wanting another confrontation.  
>"Is she okay?" Sawyer asked Shay.<br>"She just a little…jumpy."  
>Sawyer took a plate and started laying some grapes and watermelon on it. Now shay turned herself towards Sawyer.<br>"So you knew Lindsey already, from high school. Right?"  
>"Yeah"<br>"Were you friends?"  
>Sawyer took a brownie of the platter.<br>"We knew each other."  
>Shay knew enough. They both walked back into the living room with their plate of deserts.<p>

Sawyer left the party after Tyler, Keegan, Shay, Troian and Lindsey had left. It was almost 1.30am. She probably won't lie in bed until 2.30am. Sawyer put the key the ignition of her car and turned it. They engine started running. She switched the car in first and drove away from Lucy's driveway. In the back of her mind she kept thinking about those two big brown eyes she hadn't seen in so long. Of course she had seen them on TV but in real life they were so much more beautiful and magical. Sawyer shook her head. With a big sigh she put on the radio, she needed a distraction. With _Demons_ from Imagine dragons in the background, Sawyer drove back to her apartment, where her roommate Caillee was waiting for her report of this evening.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Sawyer woke up with the sound of her alarm clock on the background. Her mind immediately traveled back to last night. She kind of hoped that it was a dream but her roommate, Caillee, gave her quick reminder from behind her bedroom door: "Hey Sawyer, are you up yet? Did you have any crazy dreams about you're high school sweet heart?"  
>Sawyer replied with a groan and throwing a pillow against the door.<p>

An hour and 10 minutes later, Sawyer arrived at the Hollywood Records studio's. She walked past the front desk and greeted the receptionist by raising her hand. The receptionist greeted her back with a friendly smile. After that daily routine, Sawyer took the elevator to the third floor. While leaving the elevator behind her, her mind started to travel back to her high school years, back to the best and at the same time, the worst time of her life. She took her ID card from the building, that was clipped on her pants, and slid it through the card slot to unlock the door. She heard the familiar click and opened the door. There was no one present in the studio. She didn't mind being alone in the studio, she liked it. It didn't mean she didn't like working with Lucy and TJ in the studio, she did. But the feeling the studio gave Sawyer, when it was totally empty besides herself, was incredible.  
>Sawyer turned on the light, but only the one in the recording booth. Because nobody was there yet, she decided to play some music herself while she was waiting. She opened the door to the recording booth, took one of the guitars that stood next to the door and took place on the black stool in the booth. Sawyer started to move her fingers over the strings, it was like a second nature to her. After a minute or two just letting the guitar sounds speak to her, she opened her mouth and started singing. After beltin out her last note and letting the guitar sounds fade away on their own, she looked up through the window glass into the studio. Behind that glass she saw Lucy and TJ looking directly at her with their mouths wide open. Sawyer quickly put the guitar back on its place and walked back into the studio.<br>"So…" Sawyer started, looking from Lucy and TJ, down to the ground, trying to avoid any reaction on her being in the record booth and anything they just had heard: "Ready to work?"  
>Sawyer took her place behind the mixing desk and turned some buttons here and there.<br>The first one to get a word out was TJ: "You…were in there…singing…and playing…."  
>"I know, I'm sorry. Nobody was here yet so I thought…It won't happen again."<br>"No, that's not what I ment. You were AMAZING. If you always play and sing like that, you can be in that booth all the time, if you ask me."  
>Sawyer looked up at TJ, who stood a couple feet away from her.<br>Finally Lucy was able to speak again too: "Yeah that was awesome! Where did you learn to play like that?"  
>"I just started to play music at an early age. First piano, then guitar."<br>"You never took lessons, nobody who taught you how to play or sing?" Lucy asked.  
>"No. My mother is a singer and piano player but she didn't teach me, I just started to copy her. She did try to give me lessons but I always was one step ahead of her."<br>"Okay, that's crazy" was TJ response.  
>Sawyer smiled.<br>"With that talent, you could have your own album" TJ said.  
>"Oh no. I like singing and playing music, but I'm not really crazy about performing on a stage. I rather stay behind the scenes."<br>"You sound like you have some stage fright." Lucy said.  
>"Yeah, I kinda do."<p>

After a long day of work, they were all happy with what they had finished today.  
>"Okay," TJ began: "I have to leave now. I need to be at a late meeting in like five minutes. Can you two finish up?"<br>"Yeah, sure" Sawyer said.  
>"Be sure to lock up everything" TJ reminded them.<br>"We will. Don't worry, it's not our first time locking up the studio." Lucy said.  
>TJ smiled at the two girls, took his jacket and left the studio. When the door fell back into its lock, Lucy turned from the door towards Sawyer, who was busy saving and re-saving everything on the computer to be sure that they didn't lose anything.<br>"Hey Sawyer, can I ask you something?" Lucy asked.  
>"Yeah, sure."<br>"Why didn't you tell me you knew Lindsey?"  
>Sawyer stopped her hands from moving around for just a second. She was surprised by Lucy's question, but tried to keep a straight face: "I don't know. I think I just didn't really thought it mattered."<br>"Ow, okay… Can I ask you another question?"  
>"Yeah sure." Sawyer answered while storing away the headphones.<br>"Did Lindsey know the girl you were dating in high school?"  
>Again Sawyer stopped her hand action for a second: "Yeah…She did."<br>Now Sawyer walked into the recording booth to get the microphone, so Lucy decided to just ask the next question.  
>"IS Lindsey the girl you were dating in high school?"<br>Sawyer slowly walked back into the studio with the microphone in her hands. She stopped, turning around the mic in her hands a couple times and finally looked up at Lucy.  
>"Yeah… she was."<br>Without waiting for a reply, Sawyer looked away from Lucy and walked towards the closet to store away the microphone she was holding. Behind her, she heard Lucy take a deep breath. She was probably trying to process the information and trying to decide how to react on it. Sawyer closed the doors of the closet and turned the key to lock the it.  
>"So, yesterday was the first time you saw her again after more than seven years?"<br>"Yeah."  
>Sawyer turned back around and put the key on his rightful place.<br>"I wish you had told me. Maybe I could have taken it into account when I invited everyone."  
>"No, it's okay. I knew there was a possibility that she would be there and I can't really keep avoiding her forever."<br>"True. So…how did you feel, you know, when you saw her again?"  
>"It was…awkward."<br>Lucy chuckled a little.  
>"Wait, but how did you know that Lindsey was the girl I told you about?" Sawyer asked.<br>"I guess I felt some vibes from you two. And I wasn't the only one, Shay did too."  
>"Oh great."<br>Sawyer took a seat on the couch, put her elbows on her knees and let her head fall into her hands.  
>"I just wonder why Lindsey doesn't want anyone to know about you two, she is portraying a lesbian character on TV." Lucy said and took place next to Sawyer, who looked back up.<br>"I don't know and I don't really care."  
>"Do you really mean that? Are you really completely over her? I mean from the vibes that I felt last night, it was like there were still some fireworks left and not only from you."<br>"Euh…" with a big groan Sawyer hit her head back and leaned back on the couch: "Oh god, why can't I let her go? After all these years it's like my feelings haven't changed, at all."  
>"Hey, that's okay. It just means that, unconsciously, you want to keep fighting for her, and there's nothing wrong with that."<br>"Yeah maybe. But is it worth it to fight for someone who isn't ready to show everybody who she really is?"  
>"I don't know, I think you're the only one who can answer that question."<br>"Yeah, probably."  
>Lucy stood up from the couch.<br>"Hey, why don't we lock up the studio, get coffee downstairs and if you want we can talk some more" Lucy suggested.  
>"Sorry, I can't. I have to go home. I promised my roommate that I'd make dinner tonight and I have to get some groceries. But thanks. It did feel good to talk about it, but you have to promise not to tell anyone. I don't wanna force Lindsey to 'come out'. Not until she wants to and until she is ready."<br>"Don't worry, I won't."  
>Sawyer also stood up from to couch and grabbed her jacket from a chair. She walked towards the door but before she opened it, she stopped and turned around. Lucy looked at her, questioning.<br>"Would you mind, giving Lindsey my number? I'd like to talk to her but I don't know if she wants to. So it's probably safer to give her my number. Would you?" Sawyer asked.  
>"Yeah, sure. No problem."<p>

Two days later, after another long day, Sawyer took a long hot shower. She needed to destress and a shower was the perfect remedy for it. When She walked back into the living room, with bathrobe on, her roommate pointed to her cellphone: "You're phone has been ringing a couple times."  
>"Oh, okay, thanks."<br>"You seem to be very popular."  
>Sawyer made a funny face to Caillee, took her phone and disappeared into her bedroom.<br>She had four missed calls. The first one was from her mom, the second from Lucy, then another from her mom and the last one was from a number she didn't recognized. Sawyer dialed four figures to go to her answering machine. The female machine voice told her she had three new messages.  
>"…Hi honey, it's your mom. Just wanted to let you know your aunt is back from vacation. Maybe you can go visit her sometime. Bye."<br>Her aunt, from her mother's side, just lived a 20 minute drive from her apartment and she had been on vacation for almost three months. But apparently she was back home now.  
>"…Hey Sawyer, it's Lucy. Just letting you know that I gave Lindsey your number today. I'll cross my fingers, hoping she will call you. See ya."<br>Sawyer's heart started speeding up. Could it be? It was possible. She tried to calm herself down, to listen to the final message.  
>"… … Hi Sawyer"<br>Now Sawyer's heart almost stopped beating.  
>"…Euhm, it's Lindsey. Lucy gave me your number and said you wanted to talk… Just give me a call back if you still want to… … … Bye."<br>Sawyer was just sitting there, on her bed, looking straight ahead. Caillee knocked on the door and walked in, but before she said anything she stopped: "Wow, you look like you've just seen a ghost, or heard one. Are you okay?"  
>"…Euhm…" Sawyer, who was still sitting there with her cellphone in her hand, couldn't bring out a word.<br>Now Caillee came sitting right in front of her, looking very worried to Sawyer : "Hey…What's going on?"  
>Sawyer broke free from her stare: "She called…She called me."<br>"Who?" Caillee asked.  
>Now Sawyer looked right into Caillee's eyes: "Lindsey."<br>Caillee looked back at Sawyer: "And that's a good thing, right?"  
>"Euhm…Yeah, I guess."<br>"Don't guess. You wanted to talk to her didn't you?"  
>"Yeah."<br>"So, here's your chance. Call her back."  
>Caillee stood up from bed and walked back to the door. Before walking out of Sawyer's room, she said: "Call her." And then closed the door behind her.<br>After a minute or two to calm herself down, Sawyer took a deep breath and pushed the recall button. The phone was trying to find a connection when Sawyer put her phone to her ear. Finally it started ringing in her ear.

_TRIIING_

Don't panic, Sawyer said to herself in her mind to keep herself calm.

_TRIIING_

Just breath, she kept trying.

_TRIIING_

Please don't faint, please just…

"Hello?"

"…" Deep breath: "Hi… …it's Sawyer."

From the other side, also a deep breath: "Hi..." 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"…I'm glad you called back" Lindsey said.  
>"yeah, me too" Sawyer replied: "So, how are you?"<br>" I'm good. You?"  
>" I'm good too."<br>"Good."  
>"Yeah, good…"<br>"So,…" Sawyer wanted to continue but she got interrupted by Lindsey.  
>"You know what. I do think we need to talk but not like this, not on the phone."<br>"You're right," Sawyer agreed: "What do you suggest?"  
>"How about you come to my place…Or if you rather want me to come over to your place, or we could meet up at some more neutral ground."<br>Sawyer could here Lindsey was as nervous as she was, which made her feel a little better. Just knowing she wasn't the only one with a stomach full of jitters.  
>"Your place is fine. How about tomorrow afternoon?" Sawyer didn't have to go to work then because TJ had another meeting.<br>"I can't. I have to be on set…But I'm free tomorrow night."  
>"Tomorrow night is fine. What time?"<br>"Let's say 8 o'clock?"  
>"Okay, so I'll see you tomorrow night at 8."<br>" I'll text you my address. Okay, so tomorrow then."  
>"Yeah tomorrow."<br>"See ya."  
>"Bye."<br>And they both hung up.  
>Caillee immediately came into Sawyers room when she heard Sawyer ended her conversation with Lindsey.<br>"Oh my god, you're going on a date with your high school sweetheart" she said while taking place on the bed next to Sawyer.  
>"It's not a date…Wait did you eavesdropped on me?"<br>"No…" Caillee answered with a very guilty face: "Okay yeah. But you're going on a date."  
>"It's not a date." Sawyer tried to make clear.<br>"Oh, it's a date."  
>"It's not a date. We are just two people, who made an arrangement to have a conversation with each other. That's all."<br>"Who are you trying to convince? Me…or you?"  
>Caillee stood up from her place on the bed and walked out the bedroom, leaving a very confused Sawyer. Was it a date? Sawyer didn't know and she decided not to break her head over it. She was already getting a headache from the worrying.<p>

The next day Sawyer stayed at work after lunch, all though she didn't had to work. TJ already left for his meeting and Lucy was on the set of Pretty little liars. But Sawyer knew that if she would go home she'd go crazy. This 'date' with Lindsey gave her so much stress. She hadn't been so nervous since she performed on stage for the first time. So Sawyer decided to keep working so she could distract herself.

"…home in like 20 minutes, okay? Bye." Lucy said to the person on the other side of the line while she opened the door of the studio at Hollywood records. Sawyer turned around in her chair. The two girls were both equally surprised to see each other.  
>"Lucy. What are you doing here?" Sawyer asked.<br>"I forgot my jacket last night so I came to pick it up" Lucy said while putting her cellphone in her purse: "What are you doing here? I thought you had the afternoon off?"  
>"Yeah, I have. I just need to keep myself busy for another couple hours. Otherwise I'd be totally stressed out by tonight.<br>Lucy replied with a confused look.  
>" I'm gonna meet up with Lindsey."<br>Lucy's confused face made place for a surprised and very excited face. "Really? Oh my god, you're going on a date with Lindsey."  
>"It's not a date!"<br>"Than what is it?"  
>"…" <em>sigh <em> "I don't know."  
>"When are meeting up?"<br>"Tonight at 8."  
>"Where?"<br>"Her place…But we're just gonna talk."  
>"Well you have to start somewhere." Lucy said with a smirk. "Do you want me to stay for a while?"<br>"No I'll be fine. I think, I'm just gonna play some music."  
>"Hey, what do you say about playing something together with me?"<br>"Yeah sure, why not. Do you have something in mind?"  
>"I'm in the mood for some Jason Mraz?"<br>"I won't give up?"  
>Lucy agreed with a smile.<br>Sawyer stood up from her place and picked up a guitar. Then she took place on the couch next to Lucy. Sawyer's fingers strummed the guitar and then she started singing: "When I look into…"  
>Lucy joined in second voice: "…your eyes"<br>"It's like watching the…"  
>"…night sky"<br>"Or a beautiful…"  
>"…sunrise"<br>"Well there's so much they hold."  
>The rest of the verse they sang the same way and the chorus they sang together, two-part.<br>"Well I won't give up on us. Even if the skies get rough. I'm giving you all my love. I'm still looking up…"  
>After the song ended, Lucy stood up from her place on the couch and took her jacket, wished Sawyer good luck for tonight and expected a full report tomorrow. Then she left. Sawyer stayed at the studio for a couple more hours and then went home too. When she came home, her roommate Caillee already made dinner so Sawyer immediately took her place at the table.<br>"Don't get me wrong, it all smells delicious but…I don't think I'm able to eat," Sawyer said to her roommate.  
>"Nervous?"<br>"Yeah."  
>"Don't worry. It'll be fine. At least eat some soup."<br>"Okay. But I can't promise I'll be able to keep it down" Sawyer said with a smirk.  
>After dinner, Caillee started the dishes and Sawyer took a shower. With the help of her roommate, Sawyer picked out a nice outfit. Luckily Caillee was there to help her, otherwise it would have taken her hours, if not days. But now it was almost 8pm and Sawyer parked her car on the street in front of Lindsey's building. She turned her key out of the ignition but stayed in her seat for a couple more minutes. With one last deep breath, Sawyer opened her car door, stepped out, closed the door, pressed the lock button on her key and started walking towards the front door of Lindsey's building. Arrived at the front door, Sawyer searched for Lindsey's doorbell. It was the fourth button. Sawyer pressed it.<p>

_Bzzzz_

"Hello?"

Sawyer's heart started beating really fast.

"It's Sawyer."

"Come on in. It's on the second floor, apartment 2B"

_Click_

Lindsey had unlocked the front door so Sawyer opened it. She took the stairs to the second floor and with every step she took, her heart started beating harder, faster and louder. Only 5 steps to go. A little to the left. And there she was, right in front of Lindsey's apartment door, 2B. Sawyer raised her hand, balled it up to a fist, brought it closer to the door, but right before she touched it she stopped. Her hands got all clammy.  
>"Come on Sawyer" she said to herself, wiped her hands on her pants and then with one quick movement she knocked on the door. After a couple seconds the door opened and in the doorway stood Lindsey. She was wearing a sweatpants, a black T-shirt of Coldplay and snoopy socks. With the door in her left hand, Lindsey invited Sawyer in with her right hand: "Hi, come in."<br>Sawyer entered the apartment and immediately stood in the living room. Sawyer's eyes went left and right, up and down through the room.  
>"Did you find it easily?" Lindsey asked.<br>"Yeah," Sawyer answered.  
>"Can I take your jacket?"<br>"Sure."  
>Sawyer took of her jacket and gave it to Lindsey who hung it up on the wall next to the front door.<br>"Would you like to drink something?" Lindsey asked.  
>"No thanks." Sawyer answered.<br>"Let's sit on the couch." Lindsey suggested. Sawyer nodded, so both girls walked toward the couch and took place on the big one in the middle. They both chose a seat on the end of the couch so there was still one spot between them.  
>"How are you?" Sawyer asked.<br>"I'm good," Lindsey was very convincingly: "You?"  
>"Okay." Sawyer saw the questioning look from Lindsey so she explained: "To be honest, I'm a little nervous."<br>"Yeah, me too."  
>It stayed quiet for a minute or two and Sawyer took that time to look around a little more.<br>"I like you're place," she said.  
>"Thanks."<br>Again a minute or two went by.  
>"So…I was surprised when I saw you at Lucy's," Lindsey said.<br>"Yeah. I knew there was a possibility that I'd see you there but I also was surprised when I actually saw you."  
>Sawyer released a cough. "Can I maybe get that drink now?" she asked.<br>"Yeah sure. What would you like to drink?"  
>"Just some water is fine, thanks."<br>Lindsey stood up from the couch and went to the open kitchen behind the big couch. After a little rumble in the kitchen, Lindsey came back with two glasses of water and gave one to Sawyer: "Here you go."  
>"Thanks." Sawyer took a sip from the water and placed it on the little table in front of her. For the third time there fell an awkward silent moment. Both girls had a lot of question they wanted to ask the other but neither had the guts to start.<br>"Gotta say, this is one of the most uncomfortable moments ever." Sawyer said to lighten the mood. Luckily it helped because Lindsey replied with a laugh which made Sawyer loosen up a bit. And then a long intense gaze followed. Their eyes got just locked to each other and it felt like nothing could come between them… Accept maybe the guy who just came through the front door of Lindsey's apartment.  
>"Hi babe, I'm ho…me. I'm sorry I didn't knew you had company," the guy said.<br>"Jake, you're home." Lindsey got even more nervous with Jake being here. "Euhm…this is Sawyer she's an old friend from high school."  
>"Oh it's nice to meet you Sawyer. I'm Jake, Lindsey's boyfriend."<br>Sawyer stood up from her chair and shook his hand. "It's nice to meet you too," Sawyer said with a friendly face but on the inside she felt startled and disappointed. She didn't know Lindsey had a boyfriend and that definitively didn't make it easier to have that upcoming conversation with Lindsey. 


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

'DAMN IT! FUCK FUCK FUCK!' was all what was raising through Sawyer's mind. 'She has a boyfriend…A BOYFRIEND! How can I be so stupid!'  
>In the background Saywer heard Lindsey saying goodbye to Jake and closing the door behind him. But not before Jake gave her a kiss on the lips. Lindsey came back to the couch and took her place on her side of the couch. She tried to avoid eye contact.<br>"Jake seems nice," Sawyer said as friendly as possible.  
>"Yeah, he's sweet. I really like him." Lindsey answered.<br>Sawyer noticed she didn't say she loves him: "How long have you've been together?"  
>"Almost two years."<br>"That's great."  
>"How about you? Someone special in your life?"<br>"Euh...No…No one special."  
>"Oh… …So you are helping Lucy making are album. How is it going."<br>That was a quick change of subjects, Sawyer thought.  
>"Yeah. It's going great."<br>"It's crazy, isn't it? We both realized our dream jobs."  
>"Yeah, it's crazy." Sawyer was tired of beating around the bush and decided to ask straight forward: "Why were you so scared of being with me?"<br>Lindsey was kinda shocked from the direct question from Sawyer and Sawyer saw that in Lindsey's eyes. "I'm sorry," Sawyer apologized.  
>"It's okay." Lindsey said.<br>"It's just…I'm confused. We were together and then you broke up with me through a letter ignored me the rest of the school year, moved away afterwards and never spoke to me again. You wrote that you were scared of your feelings for me, for a girl and now you are playing one of the biggest gay role models on television…"  
>Lindsey took her time to form her answer: "I know it's confusing, it's confusing for me too. But back then I really wasn't ready for those feelings and I didn't knew what to do. I didn't wanted to hold you back so I thought the best solution was staying away from you."<br>"And what about now?"  
>"What do you mean?"<br>"You said that you weren't ready for those feelings back then, but what about now?"  
>"…Sawyer…I'm with Jake."<br>"Yeah I saw." Sawyer looked down with disappointing eyes.  
>"I'm sure you'll find a great girl soon. Any girl would be lucky to be with you."<br>"I'm not so sure about that. There hasn't been a special girl after you." This time Sawyer looked straight at Lindsey. It made her nervous what caused her to ramble: "It's not like I haven't been with anyone since you, it's just I haven't had a real relationship…" Sawyer's voice started to tremble: "Every time it got more serious I broke it off. The feelings I had for them were never as strong as the feelings I have for you?"  
>Lindsey looked at Sawyer with big startled eyes, something caught her attention: "Have, the feelings you have for me?"<br>Sawyer sighed: "Yeah, have." She looked away from Lindsey. "I know it's sad and pathetic I never got over you."  
>Lindsey's eyes kept looking to Sawyer but her startled eyes made place for sympathetic and eyes: "It's not sad or pathetic. It's just means you have a big and strong heart."<br>"Well I don't know if it can take much more before it pulverizes completely."  
>Now Lindsey looked away for a moment but when she looked back up she got a glimpse of Sawyer's eyes who were looking down but were glistening with tears.<br>"I'm Sorry," Sawyer said, wiped her fingers under her right eye to catch a tear before it started falling and stood up: "I'm not so sure anymore that it was a good idea for me to come over," Sawyer walked towards the front door, took her jacket and hang it over her right arm.  
>"Wait," Lindsey said and she stood up too: "You're not gonna tell anybody are you."<br>Sawyer almost didn't believe what she was hearing and that impression was written all over her face: "I don't get. You're telling girls not to be afraid to come out and that it's okay to be gay but when it comes to you, you're too scared yourself and you forget your own advice. You're even too scared that your friends would find out. Makes me wonder if you ever excepted your past and if your feelings for me were ever real." Sawyer turned back around towards the door and opened it, not hearing Lindsey ran towards her. Before Sawyer could open the door any further, Lindsey took her arm, turned her around and pushed her against the door with an intense kiss on Sawyer lips. It lasted more than five seconds before they unlocked themselves from each other. They both looked deep into each other's eyes and Lindsey was the first one to get any words out: "My feelings have always been the most truthful feelings I've ever had… If that even makes sense."  
>Sawyer melted with hearing those tender words and now she pushed Lindsey back to the left wall and placed herself against Lindsey with one hand on Lindsey's hips and the other pushed against the wall next to Lindsey's head. And then Sawyer kissed her, passionate and strong. Lindsey didn't wait a moment to kiss Sawyer back, and placed her hands on Sawyer's neck. The moment was so intense that they barely gasped for air. Their tongues touched and Sawyer pushed herself even harder against Lindsey's body. Suddenly Sawyer thought back on what already happened earlier that night. The awkward greeting, the nervous small talk and…Jake.<br>"Wait, wait…" Sawyer said while pulling away reluctantly: "What about Jake?"  
>Lindsey's eyes went from happy excitement to concern, but Sawyer didn't saw regret in her eyes.<br>"Oh god…I can't do this to him." Lindsey said: "I can't cheat on him."  
>Sawyer looked down and took a step back from Lindsey, thinking she didn't make a chance against Jake. Lindsey noticed Sawyer's reaction: "Hey, I just mean that Jake is very nice and sweet guy who doesn't deserve being cheated on. I need to talk to him first before I can go any further with you."<br>Sawyer felt a relieved to hear those words but still needed to know Lindsey was truly ready to be with her: "Are you sure you're ready this time to be with me? And to share these feelings with your friends and family? Because a minute ago you asked me not to tell anyone about us."  
>Lindsey took her time to carefully formulate her answer. "When I saw you walking away, all I could think of was trying to make you stay. But when you turned around I freaked out and something stupid, obviously" she said with her eyes emphasizing with her eyes: "Then you said you weren't sure if I ever really liked you, my heart broke from hearing say that and I just had to show you I did really like you and I still do. It's still gonna be scary to show my true self to my friends and family, but with you by my side I will be okay. Even more than okay, I will be great." Lindsey said with at the end a smile grow on her face which Sawyer reflected. Sawyer leaned in for another kiss and Lindsey did the same, but this time is was a sweet and tender kiss.<br>"I'll talk to him tomorrow." Lindsey said.  
>"Then I'll better go home."<br>"Why?"  
>"Just to be sure we don't do anything we shouldn't do." Sawyer said with a smirk and a wink which made Lindsey laugh. Sawyer picked up her jacket that had fallen on the floor during their kiss. She turned it around and put her arms into the sleeves. She shook a couple times with her shoulders to shake it right and pulled her hair out from under the collar. The whole time Lindsey kept watching her movements. Normally it makes Sawyer feel uncomfortable but this time it felt kinda nice. Sawyer almost couldn't believe that after all those years of wishing and hoping, she finally was back together with Lindsey and that made her feel calm and excited at the same time.<br>"I'll talk to you tomorrow?" Lindsey asked.  
>"Yeah," Sawyer said with a sweet smile on her face and gave Lindsey one last kiss, at least for tonight. She opened the door and stepped into the hallway outside Lindsey's apartment. With one last glimpse of that beautiful girl that lived in the apartment, Sawyer turned around and started walking down the stairs. Behind her she heard Lindsey closing the door. Sawyer could cry of happiness but she didn't. She rushed to her car, and drove fast but save back to her own apartment where her roommate was waiting for her return for a full report about tonight. Although Sawyer thought so. Before she turned the key in the lock Sawyer heard some noises from inside her apartment. Sawyer first thought Caillee had romantic company but then she heard a woman's voice which wasn't Cailliee's. When Sawyer entered the apartment, she saw Caillee on the couch together with Lucy, both holding a glass of red wine. They were laughing and Sawyer saw that they were really enjoying themselves. When Sawyer closed the door behind her, two pair of eyes turned to her and both girls almost jumped out of the couch from excitement.<br>"Your home" Caillee said with great enthousiasm and ran towards Sawyer: "So how was it? What happened? Tell us everything and don't you dare to leave out any detail."  
>"Euhm, how about you let me come in first."<br>"You're already in."  
>"I still have my jacket on," Sawyer said with hands sliding down her jacket. Lucy was also standing next to Sawyer now and they gave a hug to great each other.<br>"Hi Lucy. What are you doing here?" Sawyer asked.  
>"I was in the neighborhood." Lucy answered.<br>Sawyer looked at Lucy with a look like 'really?': "You were in the neighborhood ?"  
>"Okay, I called Caillee if I could come by. I was curious how it went with Lindsey" Lucy said with a guilty face: "I still am."<br>"So let's take you jacket off and take place on the couch" Caillee said while executing what she said: "Now tell us everything there is to know about what happened with Lindsey and don't leave anything out."  
>Sawyer started telling about the awkward beginning, the embarrassing moment with Jake and the steamy part with Lindsey. The whole time Lucy and Caillee listened to her attentively and their mouths were open most of the time. You could just hear them thinking 'oh my god, oh my god …'. <p>


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Sawyer was walking back and forth in her living room which made Caillee feel nervous.  
>"Can you stop pacing around, please" Caillee finally said: "Just call her!"<br>It had been 24 hours since Sawyer and Lindsey kissed and Lindsey decided that she really wanted to be with Sawyer. For that to happen Lindsey first needed to talk to Jake, her boyfriend. Well, hopefully, ex-boyfriend. But Sawyer didn't know if Lindsey already talked to Jake and if Lindsey would call her afterwards or she would call Lindsey. Sawyer decided to wait for Lindsey's call, so now she was pacing around with her phone in her hand, hoping it would ring.  
>"I can't call her. Then it seems like I've been waiting impatiently all day" Sawyer replied.<br>"You have" Caillee said expressly.  
>"Yeah…but that doesn't mean Lindsey needs to know."<br>Finally Sawyer's phone rang, only it startled Sawyer so much she almost dropped her phone. Luckily she caught her phone in time and quickly pushed on the green symbol in the screen to answer the call.  
>"Hello?"<br>"Hi Sawyer…"  
>Sawyer immediately recognized Lindsey's voice: "Hi Lindsey, how are you doing?"<br>"I'm good. How about you?"  
>"I'm good too…"<br>A short silence.  
>"I talked to Jake…" Lindsey continued. Meanwhile Sawyer moved herself from the living room to her bedroom.<br>"How did it go?"  
>"Well…I told him about us in high school and that I have been lying to myself all these years. He understood and he was very accepting. He also told me that he kinda had a feeling my heart belonged somewhere else."<br>"Really? How did he know?"  
>"I've never said <em>I love <em>you to him… And he found an old picture of us in a shoebox that I marked as 'things I'll never forget' "  
>A soft chuckle came from both sides of the line.<br>"So we're good to go…you know…further with our relationship?" Sawyer got butterflies in her belly when she said that.  
>"Uhu. Uhm…Is it okay if I tell Shay about us tomorrow? You know she's one of my best friends and I wanna tell her separately from the others."<br>"Yeah of course. But just so you know, Lucy already knows too."  
>"Wait she already knows, how?"<br>"Well she actually had already figured it out when we all got together at her place. And yesterday when I came home she was waiting for me with Caillee to get a full report about what happened and I kinda told them. Sorry" Sawyer said with guilt in her voice.  
>"No don't be. That was the plan, right, for us to be together and everyone could know."<br>"Right." Sawyer felt relieved.  
>"But hey…Who's Caillee?"<br>"Oh right, she's my roommate. We went to college together and shared a room on campus. She's also my best friend."  
>"Oh okay…" Sawyer noticed a little change in Lindsey's voice.<br>"You're not jealous, are you?"  
>"No…" Not very convincing: "Maybe a little. But I would be jealous of anyone who would share a home with you."<br>"Well that's not so difficult to fix, you know" Sawyer teased Lindsey.  
>"Now don't go to fast. First let me come out to my friends and family, okay."<br>"Don't worry. I'll give you all the time you need…As long as it doesn't take another five years."  
>Both girls laughed.<br>"Okay, I have to go now. I have to go over my dialogues from the new script. I'll talk to you tomorrow."  
>"Yeah I'd love that. Good luck tomorrow with Shay."<br>"Thanks. Bye."  
>"Bye."<br>Sawyer pushed the red symbol on her cellphone screen to end the conversation and a blissful feeling fell over her. It was like the world finally made sense and nothing could go wrong anymore.

The next day Lindsey went straight to Shay's trailer when she arrived on set. Nervously she knocked on the door. Shay responded by opening the door.  
>"Oh hi Lindsey. I was just going to make-up. Wanna join me?"<br>"Euhm, I was actually hoping I could talk to you."  
>"Now is not really a good time. I have to be ready soon. Marlene wants to start shooting in half an hour."<br>"Oh…yeah…no problem."  
>"Are you okay? You look nervous."<br>"Yeah I'm okay…It's just…euhm. I'm sorry. I can't tell you here" Lindsey said while looking around to all the crew people walking around with props, camera's, clothes.  
>"Tell you what. Why don't we meet up here at my trailer after we shot the scene at spencer's house" Shay suggested.<br>"Yeah, that's sounds good. Thanks"  
>"No problem. Are you sure you're okay?"<br>"Yeah, I'm fine."  
>"Okay. See you later."<br>"Bye" Lindsey was a little disappointed she couldn't tell Shay yet. But she also was glad that Shay saw she really needed to be listened to, and Shay searched for a time that she was free for longer than 5 minutes. Lindsey decided to go to her own trailer first to drop some stuff of and then head over to hair and make-up too.

After shooting her scenes, Lindsey went back to Shay's trailer and took place on the steps in front of the trailer door. She was holding two paper cups with coffee and sipping of one of them. On her way over she passed the coffee stand and decided to buy two cups, a regular coffee for Shay and a decaf for herself. Her nerves were already on edge all morning and she didn't want to make it worse with caffeine. After a while Shay arrived at her own trailer too.  
>"Hi" Shay said: "Have you've been waiting a long time?"<br>"I don't know, like fifteen, twenty minutes" Lindsey answered.  
>"Sorry to have you waiting so long. We had to go over some rehearsals for later."<br>"No problem. Coffee?" Lindsey said by holding the paper cup in the air in front of Shay. Shay accepted her offer: "Thanks. Let's go inside."  
>Lindsey stood up from her place on the stairs so Shay could open the door and both girl stepped inside.<br>"Do you wanna sit on the bench or at the table?" Shay asked.  
>"Bench is fine."<br>When both girls sat down Lindsey wanted to start telling Shay everything but she didn't knew where to start. Shay saw Lindsey struggling: "What's going on Lindsey? You've been nervous all morning."  
>"I broke up with Jake." That was a good way to start, Lindsey thought.<br>"Oh, I'm sorry. Are you okay?"  
>"Yeah, I'm fine."<br>Shay noticed that wasn't really the thing why Lindsey was so nervous: "You seem more than fine with it…This wasn't really the thing you wanted to tell me, isn't it?"  
>"It's part of it."<br>"What's the other part?"  
>"Well…Euhm…Remember Sawyer? You know, the girl Lucy works with and who she invited to the game night at her place."<br>"Yeah, I remember her."  
>"Do you remember that Sawyer and I were in school together and that Sawyer is gay?"<br>"Yeah, I remember that too."  
>"And do you remember that you asked me if I knew the mystery girl that Sawyer dated?"<br>"Lindsey just tell me what you want to say."  
>For that one second, Lindsey gathered all her courage: "I was that girl…I was,… well, I am the mystery girl, I dated Sawyer in high school." Lindsey looked Shay straight in the eyes.<br>Shay showed a little smile on her face: "Well to be honest, I kinda already knew that. Or at least I had my suspicions. Ever since that night you saw Sawyer, you haven't been yourself. It was like you were on edge all the time."  
>"Yeah, I didn't really feel like myself either."<br>"Lindsey, is Sawyer the reason you broke up with Jake?"  
>"Sort of. A two days ago Sawyer and I met at my place to talk about us and what happened between us, just to clear the air. We both said some things and…well…we ended up kissing."<br>"And just like that you decided to break up with Jake?" Shay said in a way it didn't feel accusative. She asked it in a way like she needed more explanation.  
>"Yeah, kinda. Don't get me wrong, Jake's a really nice guy but I don't love him. I actually never loved a guy, at least not in a way I love Sawyer." Lindsey turned her eyes down and put her cup, she was still holding, on the little table next to her. The next thing she knew, Shay was holding her in a tight hug and said: "I'm happy for you…And I'm glad you told me." Lindsey felt so relieved and felt so much lighter. It was like a huge weight fell of her shoulders. So she hit her arm around Shay and said: "Thanks."<br>When they released each other from their hug, both girls were smiling. There were a couple tears in Lindsey's eyes.  
>"Are you okay?" Shay asked.<br>"Yeah, I'm great."  
>"Hey, who else knows about this?"<br>"Euhm, just you, Jake, Sawyer's roommate and Lucy."  
>"Lucy?"<br>"Yeah. She and Sawyer became good friends and Lucy also figured it out at the game night. Apparently we weren't so good at hiding it as we thought." Lindsey smiled and Shay smiled back at her.  
>"But you actually have been struggling with this for years? Why didn't you tell me sooner? It's just…you play an out gay character when you are gay yourself but weren't really okay with that."<br>"Now you know why that crying scene in Emily's bedroom was so easy for me to do." Lindsey produced a small chuckle: "I know it's not easy to understand because I don't really understand it myself. I thought that it was just some stupid high school crush but when I saw Sawyer again after all these years, I knew that it wasn't temporarily. I guess I've always knew but never wanted to accept it."  
>"Well I'm glad you do now" Shay said and they hugged again.<br>"Are you gonna tell the others too? And what about your family?"  
>"I think I'm gonna talk to my parent tonight."<br>"And what about the others?"  
>"Well I'm not really gonna tell them like this, like I told you. I think I'm just gonna wait for a moment where it fits."<br>"Do you want me to keep my mouth shut than?"  
>"It's okay for you to say something if they ask."<br>"Okay."  
>"Yeah, okay." They both smiled at each other again.<br>"Come here." And they gave each other on last hug. 


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

It was almost 9pm and Sawyer was driving to Lindsey's parents' home. During lunch Lindsey had called to tell her she told Shay about them. Lindsey also wanted to tell her parents tonight but she asked Sawyer to come over after she talked to them so they all could meet.  
>Sawyer just parked her car in the street Lindsey had given her. Now she only needed to wait for a text from her girlfriend. That's what they agreed on, Sawyer would get a text when Lindsey had the conversation with her parents. Then after the big meeting it would be time for dessert. That's why there was a platter with brownies sitting on the seat next to Sawyer. She had just enough time to make them but they were still a little warm.<p>

_Bzzzzz_

Sawyer quickly took her cellphone from the dashboard and opened the new text she got.  
><em>Have you met her parents yet? xxCaillee<em>  
>A groan of irritation escaped Sawyers mouth. With quick fingers she started pressed on the screen to text her roommate back.<br>_NO! Don't you have something else to do than checking up on me?_  
>Sawyer pressed send. She didn't need to wait long for a respond from her roommate.<br>_Sorry :s_ _:p_  
>After looking at the text, Sawyer let her phone fall into her lap. She stretched her armes all the way over the steering wheel and twisted them so her elbows made a cracking sound. Then she folded her hands behind her head and took a deep breath.<p>

_Bzzzzz_

Sawyer looked down to her phone and saw her girlfriends name appearing on the screen. She opened the text and read out loud: "I talked to my parents and it's save to come in. I'll tell you the rest inside." At the end of the text there was a smiley face and three x's. All though Sawyer knew that Lindsey's parents were okay with the whole situation, she was still nervous to meet them. When Sawyer and Lindsey were together in high school, Sawyer never had met them. Sawyer never even been at Lindsey's home back then. Lindsey didn't want to risk her parents finding out so they always met up at Sawyer's place. But now the time was finally here. Sawyer stepped out her car, took the platter with brownies from the seat and locked her car after closing the door. She started walking down the street and after passing just six houses, Sawyer saw Lindsey's car on the driveway of a house with single storey and a medium sized front yard. Sawyer checked the address just to be sure. The number Lindsey gave her was 102 and next to the front door the number 102 was hanging under a little light. With a nervous but brick pace Sawyer walked to the front door. Arrived at the white door, Sawyer pressed the button for the doorbell. She heard a door open inside, steps on the floor and then a click from unlocking the door. It was Lindsey who opened the door and invited her in.  
>"Hi" she said and gave Sawyer a little kiss on the lips. It took Sawyer a bit by surprise but still it felt so natural. Like it never had been different.<br>"Hi" Sawyer responded and stepped inside: "So what did they say?"  
>"Well after I finished my story, they asked me if I was happy. I said yes. They said that was the only thing that mattered."<br>Sawyer smiled and now she planted a kiss on Lindsey's lips.  
>"Are you ready?" Lindsey asked when Sawyer pulled back.<br>Sawyer nodded. They walked down the hall together and entered the second door on the right. Lindsey went in first and then Sawyer followed. Sawyer noticed they had entered the family room and at the dining table were sitting two people, a man and a woman. The woman stood up from her chair when she saw Sawyer and a second later the man followed her. Lindsey took Sawyer by the hand and brought her closer to the table.  
>"Mom, dad" Lindsey started: "This is Sawyer Brookes, my girlfriend. Sawyer, these are my parents."<br>Sawyer reached forward to shake Lindsey's parent's hands: "It's nice to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Shaw."  
>"It's nice to meet you too, Sawyer" Lindsey's mom said: "And please, call me Barb and this is my husband Mike."<br>Lindsey's father, Mike, smiled: "Why don't we take place at the table and have some dessert."  
>"Oh that's right" Sawyer said, still holding the plate of brownies: "I made some brownies."<br>Sawyer handed over the plate to Barb.  
>"That's very nice of you. Thank you" Barb said.<br>Mike took his place at the table again and Sawyer took a place on the opposite side while Barb and Lindsey went into the kitchen. They came back with two trays: one with cups, a coffee can and a teapot, the other one with all kinds of delights. After setting it down on the table, they also took place at the table. Barb went sitting back next to her husband and Lindsey took place next to Sawyer.  
>"What would you like to drink Sawyer?" Barb asked: "There is tea, coffee or if you rather have something cold to drink…"<br>"Tea please" Sawyer answered. So Barb poured hot tea in a cup and gave it to Sawyer. When everyone had a cup in front of them, it was time to eat a yummy dessert. There was apple cake, oatmeal cookies and Sawyer's brownies. Sawyer decided to taste an oatmeal cookie.  
>"So Sawyer" Mike started: "You have dated my daughter before, hu. Why haven't we met until now?"<br>Lindsey spoke before Sawyer could answer: "Dad, I already told you that wasn't her fault. I was the one who didn't want anyone to know about us."  
>Lindsey looked sideways at Sawyer to reassure her.<br>"Fine. Then I'll ask her about her job. What do you do for a living" Mike asked Sawyer.  
>"Euhm, I'm an assistant producer at Hollywood records" Sawyer answered.<br>"Oh wow, sounds important" Barb said.  
>"Not really. I just help making music for singers that are signed at the record company" Sawyer said.<br>"She actually is working together with Lucy" Lindsey said.  
>"Oh, your colleague, the girl who plays Aria on Pretty little liars?" Barb asked Lindsey.<br>"Yeah. It's actually because of her we met again after all these years" Lindsey responded.  
>Barb seemed to like Sawyer already but it looked like Lindsey's father still needed to be convinced a little more. Then, in the corner of her eye, Saywer saw a beautiful electric guitar on a stand next to a potted plant: "Oh my god. Is that a Gibson Custom 1957 Les Paul Goldtop?"<br>All eyes turned from Sawyer to the guitar.  
>"Yes indeed" Mike said proudly.<br>"My dad use to have one too."  
>"Your father has taste. Do you play?"<br>"Yeah" Sawyer answered in all her excitement, forgetting about her stage fright for a second.  
>"Well, let's hear something."<br>That took Sawyer a bit by surprise but she also knew she kind of provoked it herself. Lindsey saw Sawyer's eyes so decided to intervene: "Dad, why don't we do that another time. It's getting late and we both have to go to work tomorrow."  
>Sawyer felt relieved when Mike agreed. After drinking the last bit of their drink, they all stood up and walked to the front door.<br>"It was very nice to meet you both and thank you for dessert" Sawyer said and gave both Mike and Barb a handshake.  
>"It was nice to meet you too and remember, you're always welcome here" Barb said.<br>"Bye mom" Lindsey said and kissed her mom on the cheek: "Dad" and also gave him a kiss on the cheek. After saying goodbye one more time, Lindsey and Sawyer walked out the front door.  
>"You did great and they love you already" Lindsey whispered in Sawyer's ear while walking towards Lindsey's car. "Hey do you wanna go to my place?" Lindsey asked. Sawyer turned to Lindsey and took a step closer. They were now standing next to Lindsey's car at the driver's door.<br>"I thought it was getting late and that we both needed to go to work tomorrow" Sawyer said.  
>"I have a bed at my apartment, you know" Lindsey said playful and put her hands on Sawyer's hips to pull her closer.<br>"Ow…" Sawyer reacted and then kissed Lindsey, sweet and slow, not knowing Lindsey's mom was watching them from behind the window.  
>"Ooooh, they are so sweet together and they really look happy" Barb said.<br>"Well at least we don't have to worry anymore of her getting pregnant" Mike responded.  
>"Mike…!"<br>"What…?" Daniel said with a smirk while Barb walked back at him and letting the happy couple behind her.

The two girls arrived at Lindsey's place at the same time, but in different cars. Lindsey parked her car at her usual spot and Sawyer parked not so far from the spot she parked a couple nights ago. At the front door of the building, Lindsey waited for Sawyer. Hand in hand they walked inside, up the stairs and through the front door of Lindsey's apartment.  
>"Let me give you a tour. You already have seen the hallway…the kitchen...and the living room" Lindsey said while taking of her jacket and giving Sawyer a short kiss after every room she mentioned. Sawyer started taking of her own jacket slowly but Lindsey gave her a hand and pushed the jacket down a little faster. Another kiss followed her actions.<br>"Now let me show you the rest" Lindsey continued and pulled Sawyer with her to a hallway behind the kitchen: "Over there you can find the bathroom and here…" Now Sawyer interrupted Lindsey with a kiss. Lindsey put her hand on the doorknob behind her: "…we have…" Another kiss and Lindsey now opened the door: "the bedroom." Lindsey pulled Sawyer inside before Sawyer had the chance to kiss her again but Lindsey quickly made it up by pinning Sawyer to the wall next to the door. Lindsey started kissing Sawyer on the lips and then deviated to her cheek and her neck. Lindsey went lower and lower. When she came back up, she had put her hands under Sawyer's shirt and pulled it up over Sawyer's head. With a smooth swing, Lindsey threw the shirt to the side. Now it was Sawyer's turn. She leaned her body against Lindsey and pushed her backwards until they reached the bed. Sawyer let her weight completely fall against Lindsey so they both fell over on the bed. Lindsey crawled from under Sawyer a little higher and Sawyer followed her while kissing Lindsey on her belly, then between breast, her neck and finished with a very intense tongue kiss where Sawyer moved her tongue over the middle of Lindsey's hard palate. This made Lindsey feel even more aroused and Sawyer knew that from the time they spent together in high school. Sawyer could feel Lindsey's muscles tighten under her. Then in a quick movement, Lindsey twisted around whereby she got on top of Sawyer. She sat up and pulled her own shirt over her head and threw it aside. Soon her bra followed and then she pinned herself back against Sawyer with an intense kiss while pushing her leg between Sawyer's. When they released from there kiss, the two girls looked deep into each other's eyes. A big smiled appeared on Sawyer's face which made Lindsey wonder why.  
>"What?" She asked.<br>"I was just thinking" Sawyer answered.  
>"About what?"<br>"That I'm the luckiest girl alive…"  
>Lindsey's heart made a little jump. She knew that she was the lucky one, because Sawyer had given her a second chance and Lindsey wasn't about to screw it up.<p> 


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Sawyer woke up from an alarm sound she didn't recognized. Searching around with her hand but her eyes closed, she found the cellphone that was making the noise. Sawyer opened her eyes, pressed _stop_ and closed her eyes again. She put her arm under the covers and found herself lying naked in bed. Surprised Sawyer opened her eyes again and saw she wasn't in her own bedroom. That's when her memory started kicking in. Last night, after meeting Lindsey's parents, they went back to Lindsey's place. It didn't take long before they ended up in bed lying on top of each other. With the memory of last night in the back of her mind, Sawyer turned around with a blissful feeling. But it quickly turned into worry when she found the other side of the bed empty. Sawyer sat herself straight up, pulled up the blanket up to cover her chest and looked around searching for her clothes. Next to the bed she found her bra. She grabbed it from the floor but before she could put it on, Lindsey appeared in the doorway. As quickly as her worry had come over her, it faded away from seeing her girlfriend standing there looking happy. Lindsey was wearing a long shirt from Maroon 5 and nothing else, Sawyer guessed.  
>"Good morning" Lindsey greeted her naked girlfriend while taking place on the bed. She completed her greeting by giving Sawyer a soft, sweet but strong morning kiss.<br>"Good morning to you too" Sawyer said, looking Lindsey deep into her eyes. They sat there for a couple seconds, just watching each other. Then Sawyer took a deep breath and broke eye contact.  
>"What time is it?" she asked looking behind her to the cellphone she had heard the alarm come from a couple minutes ago.<br>"I think it's 7.30" Lindsey answered: "I've got some good news. Marlene called and said that I didn't have to be on set 'till 10." Lindsey was running her finger up and down Sawyer's arm while she talked.  
>"Well that's sounds very nice, but I do have to start working at 9" Sawyer said.<br>"I'm sure there's still plenty of time to take a shower" Lindsey teased. The two girls smiled at each other.  
>"A shower sounds good" Sawyer agreed with the idea.<br>"You go ahead. I'm just gonna text Shay I'm gonna be a little later."  
>Sawyer stepped out of bed and Lindsey's eyes dilated. That hadn't escaped Sawyer: "You like the view."<br>Lindsey only nodded and followed her girlfriend with big eyes and a slightly open mouth. When Sawyer walked out of the bedroom Lindsey took her cellphone from the nightstand. Suddenly Sawyer stuck her head back in the room.  
>"Hey…Lindsey…Where is the bathroom?" she asked.<br>"You don't remember? I told you last night."  
>"Yeah…I wasn't really paying attention to that…I was kinda focused on something else" Sawyer said playful which made Lindsey laugh. She stepped of the bed and threw her cellphone on the pillow. She took Sawyer's hand and pulled her with her to show her the shower.<br>"Now this time do pay a little attention" Lindsey said as playful as Sawyer did before.  
>"I'll try" Sawyer replied: "Didn't you needed to text Shay?"<br>"Marlene can fill her In" Lindsey said with a wink. Arrived at the bathroom Lindsey pulled Sawyer inside and closed the door behind her, but not before pulling the only garment she was wearing, over her head.

After her hot shower with Lindsey, literally and figuratively, Sawyer was trying to find all her clothes. She already found her underwear and her pants but she couldn't find her T-shirt. Walking around with her pants and bra on, Sawyer finally found her T-shirt but not on a rather unexpected place.  
>"Hey Lindsey, I've got a little problem here" Sawyer called to Lindsey who came running to the bedroom.<br>"What's wrong? Did you find your clothes?" Lindsey asked. Sawyer turned to Lindsey and took a step to her right. Now Lindsey could see what was wrong. Sawyer's T-shirt was hanging into the fish tank that stood in Lindsey's bedroom.  
>"Ohw…" was Lindsey's response.<br>"I didn't notice last night, you have a fish tank."  
>"Yeah… Apparently I didn't notice it standing there either." They chuckled. "Here, you can borrow one of my shirts" Lindsey said and guided Sawyer to her closet with one hand on Sawyer lower back. Standing in the closet Lindsey went to stand behind Sawyer, who was searching through the T-shirts. Lindsey hit her arms around her girlfriend, who was still half naked, and started giving little kisses on her shoulder and the side of her neck. Sawyer enjoyed the skin on skin contact and turned around to meet Lindsey's lips with hers. They started kissing stronger but before it could get even more intense, Saywer pulled back.<br>"Mmmmh" she moaned: "…we can't. I have to be at work in like 40 minutes and it's a half hour drive."  
>Lindsey pouted: "Fine. But you're not leaving before breakfast. I'll be in the kitchen." Lindsey gave a sweet kiss before she left the closet. Sawyer watched her girlfriend leave and then turned back towards the rack with T-shirts. She decided to go with a long sleeved black and white T-shirt with a cute panda face on. After putting it on, Sawyer went to the kitchen to find a wonderful breakfast waiting for. Pancakes, scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, cereals, fresh orange juice. It wasn't until she saw and smelt that incredible breakfast, Sawyer noticed how hungry she was. She sat down at a place where the table was set and Lindsey took place opposite of Sawyer.<br>"This breakfast looks amazing" Sawyer said, looking with big eyes at the food in front of her.  
>"Yeah and it tastes pretty good too. But probably not as good as the breakfast from earlier" Lindsey said and then bit on her under lip and raised her eyebrows. Sawyer laughed and then took a sip from her fresh cold orange juice, hoping it would cool her down a bit.<p>

It was 9.20am when Sawyer arrived at work. She ran through the reception to the elevator. When the doors opened Sawyer stepped in the cabin. Amber, the mail girl, also got in with her mail cart.  
>"You seem to be in a hurry" Amber noticed.<br>"Yeah, I'm actually late for work."  
>"You…late for work? You never have been late" Amber said wonderingly.<br>"Well yeah…I've also never had a relationship since I work here" Sawyer said with a smirk.  
>"Oh" Amber didn't really know how to react. Sawyer produced a short laugh which made the situation a little less tense. When the elevator doors opened, Sawyer quickly stepped out, said goodbye to Amber and then ran to the studio.<br>"Sorry I'm late" Sawyer apologized when she entered the studio. TJ was sitting behind the control panel and Lucy just finished singing in the recording booth.  
>"It's okay. Traffic jam?" TJ asked.<br>"I wish I could say yes, but no" Sawyer answered: "What are we doing? I thought the recording was done."  
>"We just recorded a couple background sounds that were missing. Nothing big."<br>Lucy came out of the booth: "Hey, you're here. How come you're so late."  
>"Euhm…There were just some unforeseen circumstances."<br>"But not traffic jam" TJ stated.  
>Sawyer took out her jacket and that drew Lucy's attention: "Hey, that shirt, it looks kinda familiar. Doesn't Lindsey have one like that?"<br>Sawyer kept silent, avoiding eye contact.  
>"Lindsey who?" TJ asked without looking away from the computer screen.<br>"Lindsey Shaw, one of my co-starts on PLL" Lucy answered with her eyes focused on Sawyer.  
>"Oh you mean the girl who plays Paige" TJ said, focused on the computer screen: "She's hot."<br>"Yeah…and taken" Lucy stated with a smirk which Sawyer copied. That quickly turned into them both laughing.  
>"What are you two laughing about?" TJ asked not noticing the obvious.<br>"Nothing…" Sawyer answered and then turned to the control panel: "Tell me what I can do."  
>Lucy chuckled and then turned herself towards TJ: "Okay, if I'm done here. I'm gonna head out. I should be on set soon. Bye."<br>"Yeah bye. Thanks for coming in such short notice" TJ thanked Lucy.  
>"No problem. See ya Sawyer" Lucy said to Sawyer on a teasing sound.<br>Sawyer answered with a laughing smirk and a: "See ya."

Lindsey arrived at five to twelve on the set of Pretty little liars and with a strong pace she walked over to where Shay, Ashley and Troian were talking.  
>"Hey Lindsey, you're just in time. We're gonna start on our scene soon" Shay greeted Lindsey.<br>"You look like you had a good night" Troian stated with a smirk: "…That boyfriend of yours seems to be quite handy."  
>"I wasn't with Jake" Lindsey replied. Troian and Ashley both had a questioning look on their faces but Shay knew better. She gave Lindsey an encouraging nod.<br>"Actually Jake and I broke up" Lindsey continued after taking a deep breath.  
>"Oh that's too bad" Ashley said.<br>"Yeah she seems really devastated about it" Troian said sarcastically and then turned back to Lindsey: "Come on, you're not gonna tell me you didn't got in bed with someone last night. You're having that typical sex glow going on."  
>"I didn't say I wasn't with someone else" Lindsey stated.<br>Both Ashley's and Troian's face changed to excited and curious when Lindsey said that.  
>"Well then let's hear it. What's his name? How old is he?" Ashley asked.<br>"Sorry can't answer those questions."  
>"Oh come on" Troian was disappointed: "They're just some basic questions. Nothing to personal…yet." Troian ended with a naughty smirk.<br>"I know but I really don't have an answer for those questions" Lindsey tried to clarify by emphasizing _those_. Ashley and Troian looked confused at each other.  
>"Can I give them a hint?" Shay finally asked. Lindsey assented with a nod so Shay gave Ashley and Troian a hint: "Try using a different pronoun." They thought about.<br>"Her name?" Ashley asked with a questioning look on her face. Lindsey confirmed with a smile.  
>"Oooooooh it's a girl! Oh my god that's awesome." Troian said excited. She gave Lindsey a hug and then looked a little more serious: "But we still want a name."<br>Lindsey laughed. "Sawyer" Lindsey finally said.  
>"Sawyer…Like the girl who works with Lucy on her album? And who we met at the game night?" Troian asked.<br>"Exactly like that" Lindsey answered with a smirk.  
>"Oh that's super cute" Ashley said, but then had a thought: "Wait …sorry if I'm laying the wrong links here but…the super-secret girlfriend of Sawyer from high school, was that you?"<br>Lindsey took a deep breath and nodded.  
>"I knew it!" Troian said loud with big excited eyes.<br>"Yeah, apparently you weren't the only one. Shay and Lucy knew too."  
>"Well I'm glad you told us and I'm happy for you" Troian said and gave Lindsey another hug.<br>"Yeah me too" Ashely followed and added herself to the hug.  
>"Hey what about me?" Shay asked feeling a bit left out. The three girls opened their group hug so Shay could join them.<br>"Hey girls, are you all coming. Lindsey, Shay were almost ready for your rehearsal" Marlene called. The girls broke up their hug and they all walked towards Marlene, who was waiting with a script and a pencil in her hands. While walking over to the director Lindsey thought how Lucky she was, having such great friends that accepted her no matter what and who are happy for her when she's happy. She felled blessed and thankful for that and it put a smile on her face.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"I have a proposal" Lindsey said enthusiastic with the phone against her ear. Sawyer, who was hanging on the other side of the line, said with amusement in her voice: "Owh. Isn't that a little soon?" Lindsey laughed: "Not that kind of proposal, I mean like a suggestion."  
>"Haha. Let's hear it."<br>After coming home from work, Lindsey was really excited to officially introduce Sawyer to her friends as her girlfriend.  
>"I was thinking we could invite Troian, Shay, Ashley, Lucy and the guys to my home. And then we could have like a game night again or so."<br>"Yeah, sounds good. When did you have in mind?"  
>"This Saturday?"<br>"I do have to work 'till six that day so I won't be able to help you get ready."  
>"No problem."<br>"Okay than."  
>"Great, I'll start calling around."<br>"You do that. I still need to take a shower anyway."  
>"Okay, I see you tomorrow for our date. Bye.<br>"Bye." And they hung up.

After Sawyer took her shower , she went to her room. She was in the mood for some music so she took out her map with songs she wrote herself. With the map open in her hands, she took place at her piano. It was a digital Hemingway that she had for almost 6 years. Sawyer pressed the on button and played a couple chords to warm up her fingers. Smoothly she made a transition from the chords to a song. First with one hand, then with two and at last her voice.  
>"I need a wrecking ball. I want the sky to fall. God I feel so small, tonight… I need a wrecking ball. I could crash and fall. Could it break my walls and make it right?... Can I begin again?…Can I begin again?…" Caillee came standing in the doorway but Sawyer kept singing. For some reason she wasn't as nervous as when she sings on stage or when she records herself.<br>"I need a tidal wave. Come and wash away. All the mess I made to make it right…I need to make it right…" Now the chorus. "…I need a big move…I need a sharp knife…I need to cut these scars right out of my life. I need a big move…I need a sharp knife…Need to be shaken up, tonight…I need a wrecking ball…"  
>After Sawyer finished the song and turned around, she saw that Caillee had taken place on her bed.<br>"It's been a while since I heard you sing one of your own songs" Caillee said.  
>"Yeah, I know" Sawyer replied with a soft smile.<br>"How did it feel?"  
>"Good, I guess." Sawyer shrugged.<br>"Why haven't you played one in so long?"  
>"I don't know…I guess I didn't feel like playing one of my own."<br>_Bzzzzz  
><em>Sawyer's phone buzzed. She got a text from Lindsey.  
>"Everybody's coming! " it said. Sawyer smiled.<br>"What?" Caillee asked.  
>"I think Lindsey is really excited for Saturday."<br>"That's good, right?"  
>"Yeah, it's definitively good. She just surprised me, you know." They smiled at each other.<br>"So, what does your mom say about you being back together with Lindsey."  
>"Oh god, my mom!" Sawyer shouted and abruptly stood up from the place: "I completely forgot to tell her…How can I forget something like that?" Caillee had to laugh with her roommates panic attack.<br>"I'm gonna call her, immediately" Sawyer said but Caillee stopped her.  
>"You better wait 'till tomorrow it's already 11.30. I don't think your mom is still awake enough for that kind of information."<br>"Good point. I tell her tomorrow. Thanks."  
>"No problem" Caillee said while leaving her place on the bed: "I'm gonna go to bed now. Goodnight."<br>"Yeah goodnight." In the back of her mind Sawyer kept asking herself how she could be so forgetful. It kept her awake for almost two hours but then finally she fell asleep.

"You did…Really?...And it's official?" Sawyer's mom sounded really excited on the phone and Sawyer could just imagine her mother standing on her tippy toes with the phone in her hand and big open flurried eyes.  
>"Yeah mom. She even told her parents already and her friends" Sawyer replied.<br>"Oh god. I'm so happy for you."  
>"Thanks mom." Sawyer was truly grateful.<br>"Oh you two should come over for diner sometime. Are you free Sunday?"  
>"I don't know, but I'll pass it along Lindsey and then I'll get back to you on that. Okay?"<br>"Yeah sure. Oh I still can't believe it. My little girl finally together again with her true love."  
>"Mom! Don't get too cheesy, please."<br>"Sorry, my bad."  
>"Okay, I have to go. I made plans with Lindsey."<br>"Give her my greetings, will you."  
>"I will. Bye mom."<br>"Bye sweetheart." Sawyer pushed the red telephone button on the her cellphone screen. With a blissful feeling she let herself fall backwards on her bed. She just couldn't have wished for a better response from her mother. But she hadn't much time to relax and enjoy the feeling because the doorbell rang. She quickly got of her bed and jogged to the front door. When Sawyer opened the door, her girlfriend was standing on the other side. Sawyer invited her in.  
>"Welcome to my humble place" Sawyer said with a little theatrical flair. Lindsey walked inside.<br>"Thank you" she replied with the same theatrical flair as Sawyer. "Woow, it's so cozy."  
>"Hey Sawyer, when is Lindsey coming…?" Caillee asked when she walked in the room not knowing Lindsey had already arrived: "Oh...Hi…Didn't know you were already here…My bad."<br>"It's okay" Sawyer reassured her roommate: "Lindsey, I want you to meet my best friend and roommate Caillee. Caillee, this is my girlfriend Lindsey."  
>"Hi, it's nice to meet you" Caillee reached out for a handshake.<br>"It's nice to meet you too" Lindsey accepted the handshake. Then she turned back to Sawyer: "Ready?"  
>"Yeah, just let me take my jacket." Sawyer answered.<br>"Where are two lovebirds going?" Caillee asked.  
>"We're going ice-skating" Sawyer answered, walking back in the room with her gloves in her hand.<br>"Oh sounds fun."  
>"What are you planning on doing tonight?" Sawyer asked her roommate.<br>"I'm just gonna see a movie I guess" Caillee answered when she walked over to the couch. Sawyer felt sorry for Caillee. She turned to Lindsey and: "Hey Lindsey, I know we were going on a date but maybe we could invite Caillee to come with us. I kinda feel bad for her."  
>"Yeah, sure. No problem" Lindsey answered with a smile.<br>"Thanks" Sawyer kissed Lindsey on the cheek and then turned to Caillee: "Hey Caillee, do you wanna come ice-skating with us?"  
>"Yeah I'd love that" Caillee answered excited: "But are you sure it's okay. I don't wanna ruin your date."<br>"It's no problem at all. Now I can get to know Sawyer's best friend" Lindsey reassured Sawyer's roommate. Caillee quickly grabbed her jacket, some gloves and then they all walked out the door together.

On the ice-skating rink, Lindsey and Sawyer were skating hand in hand.  
>"So, I called my mom and told her we are dating again. She was really really happy for us" Sawyer told Lindsey.<br>"Oh that's good. I'm glad she isn't mad at me for leaving you heartbroken." Sawyer's mom was the only person who knew when Sawyer and Lindsey were together in high school. She understood it had to be a secret but she wasn't always happy about it. Especially because her daughter had already come out of the closed and then had to hide again for being with Lindsey.  
>"Of course not. She even asked if we could come over for diner sometime."<br>"Sounds good. I'd love to see her again."  
>"Well she suggested this Sunday."<br>"Oh I can't. I promised my grandma that I come by this Sunday."  
>"That's no problem. I just suggest my mom another date. Did you have something in mind?"<br>"How about next Sunday?"  
>"Sure I'll pass it along."<br>"Hey, where is Caillee?"  
>"Oh she got off the ice after just five rounds, I think" Sawyer said with a smirk.<br>"Didn't she like ice-skating?"  
>"Yeah she does, but she's talking to this guy she bumped into when she tried to stop." Both girls laughed.<br>"So, are you excited for Saturday?"  
>"Yeah, of course."<br>"Hey, I was wondering if maybe you would like to bring your guitar." Sawyer stopped abruptly.  
>"What? Why?" She asked suspicious.<br>"To play a song for us…You look like you just saw a ghost. Are you okay?"  
>"I can't."<br>"Can't what?" Lindsey asked worried.  
>"I can't sing in front of you all…"<br>"Why not?"  
>"In my senior year of high school something happened, something bad. I've got stage fright ever since."<br>"Oh I'm sorry. I didn't know. What happened then?" Sawyer looked down. She didn't know if she should tell or not. Lindsey noticed her girlfriend was really struggling with it.  
>"Hey it's okay" Lindsey comforted Sawyer by putting her hand on Sawyer's arm: "If you're not ready to tell me, you don't have to."<br>"Thanks" Sawyer thanked her girlfriend and rewarded her with a sweet smile. Together they pushed off with one skate and went around for another couple rounds.  
>After they were on the ice for almost two hours they went back home, but without Caillee. She decided to stay a little longer and the guy she just met would bring her home. When the couple arrived at Sawyer's apartment, she invited Lindsey in for a drink and a desert.<br>"What would you like for desert?" Sawyer asked.  
>"Do you have ice-cream?" Lindsey replied back.<br>"Yeah, I think we have cookie dough and strawberry."  
>"Oooh cookie dough please." Sawyer took out the pot with cookie dough out of the freezer and two spoons from the drawer. With their desert in her arms, she and Lindsey took place on the couch. Lindsey took out the first spoon of ice-scream and put it in her mouth.<br>"Mmm, this is good." Sawyer copied her.  
>"Euhm…Lindsey, can I talk to you?" Sawyer asked.<br>"Yeah sure" Lindsey replied, seeing that Sawyer wanted to talk about something serious, so she went sitting a little straighter.  
>"Do you remember Alexis Campbell?"<br>"Alexis…? Oh wait that queen bee that always got the lead part in the musicals, right?"  
>"Yeah."<br>"Oh and she was in the same grade as you, wasn't she?"  
>"Yeah, well in our senior year she didn't get the lead part in the musical, I did."<br>"Oh that's great."  
>"Yeah, Alexis didn't think so. The minute Mrs. Callaway revealed who got which part, Alexis decide to make the rest of my senior year a living hell. She started making up rumors, tripped me in the cafeteria and to top it off she embarrassed me at opening night in front of the hole audience. After that night I didn't wanna do it anymore so I backed out. Alexis performed in my place after that."<br>"That's awful." Lindsey really sympathized with Sawyer: "But what did she do that has giving you this stage fright?"  
>"She had bribed the guys who controlled the music and put in different music pieces so it looked like I forgot all my songs."<br>"That's just terrible. She did get punished, right?"  
>"I wish. Everyone kept silent 'cause they were all afraid of her."<br>"I guess I understand where that fright is coming from but if you give in to it, Alexis got what she wanted."  
>"I know but it's not that easy to leave behind me."<br>"I understand…Why don't you try by little steps."  
>"Okay…What did you have in mind?"<br>"How about singing for me…" Lindsey put on a goofy smile which made the mood less tens but Sawyer was still nervous enough to doubt herself.  
>"I don't know…"<br>"Come on…You have sung for me before and you know I love you voice and your music." Sawyer sighed stood up and reached her hand out to Lindsey. Lindsey took it and walked behind Sawyer, who guided Lindsey to her bedroom. She showed Lindsey to her bed and said she could sit down if she wanted. Sawyer took place behind her piano. The music score form her song _Begin again_ was still on the lectern on top of the piano, so she decided to play that one. She had refreshed two days ago so it was still pretty fresh in her memory. Sawyer looked back over her shoulder on more time to meet Lindsey's eyes and then put her hands on the keys.  
>After ending the song, Lindsey walked over to the piano, pulled Sawyer on her feet and gave her a strong but gentle kiss.<br>"That was beautiful" Lindsey complimented her girlfriends work. They smiled at each other and Sawyer gave Lindsey another kiss to thank her. It felt good to sing for her girlfriend and Sawyer loved how supportive Lindsey was. Sawyer didn't know she could ever live without her again. 


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

It was Saturday evening and Lindsey was still putting everything on its place when her doorbell rang for the second time.  
>"Do you want me to get that?" Shay asked.<br>"Yeah, if you could" Lindsey replied with a sweet but panicked smile: "Thanks."  
>"No problem" Shay said with the intercom phone already in her hands: "Lindsey's home, can I help you?"<br>"Shay, is that you?" Troian asked from the other side of the line.  
>"Oh hi Troian. I'll buzz you in. Hang on."<br>_Bzzzzz_  
>"Thanks" Troian said before Shay hung up. A little later someone knocked on the door.<br>"Oooh I'll get that" Ashley said excited. "Hiiiiii" she said when pulling the door open with a big swing.  
>"You're already here too?" Troian said: "I'm not too late, am I?"<br>"No not at all" Lindsey came from behind the corner. Troian came further inside, hung up her jacket and entered the living room. There she found Lucy and also Tyler sitting on the couch. She said hello but first went to Lindsey before taking place on the couch too.  
>"You look kinda nervous" Troian said to Lindsey, who was running through her kitchen.<br>"That's because I am" Lindsey replied.  
>"Is Sawyer coming too?"<br>"Yeah" Lindsey answered and looked up for a second.  
>"That's explains a lot" Troian said with a smirk on her face and then walked to the couch to take place next to her co-stars and friends.<br>"She's a mess" Troian whispered.  
>"Yeah, why is that? It's not like she hasn't hosted one of our game nights before" Tyler said. Lucy and Troian only suppressed a smile looking at each other. In the next half hour the rest of the guests arrived. Ian, Keegan and also Sasha. Another half hour later they were just sitting in the living room, drinking an aperitif,f when the doorbell rang.<br>"Are we still expecting someone?" Ian asked.  
>"I'll be right back" Lindsey said and walked over to the intercom phone. While she answered that, Tyler turned to Lucy, who was sitting next to her: "Is Jake coming too?" Another suppressed smile between Lucy and Troian and this time Ashley and Shay joined them. A few minutes later they heard a couple knocks on the door. When Lindsey opened the door, it was Sawyer who walked in.<br>"Hi, I've got the dip sauce you asked for" Sawyer greeted while holding a white plastic bag up.  
>"Thank you, you're a life saver" Lindsey said and gave Sawyer a quick kiss on the lips to greet and thank her girlfriend.<br>In the living room, everyone had followed the scene. Lucy, Troian, Ashley and Shay were all looking at the couple with a 'Oooh so cute'-face, while the others were looking with a 'What the hell just happened'-face.  
>"Oh and you brought your guitar" Lindsey stated when she saw Sawyer holding a guitar bag.<br>"Yeah,…but that doesn't mean I'm gonna play" Sawyer replied with a smirk. Together they walked further inside. Lindsey went back to the kitchen and Sawyer walked over to the living room to take a place with the other guests. The hole time she got followed by eight pairs of eyes. She tried to ignore them but that wasn't as easy as Sawyer had hoped.  
>"Well this is getting really uncomfortable" Sawyer finally said. Lindsey also came to the living room and sat herself down next to Sawyer.<br>"Let's play a game while we wait for our pizza" Lindsey suggested.  
>"Sure, why don't we play the question game from last time" Keegan said, still looking at Lindsey and Sawyer.<br>"Yeah, fine" Lindsey answered with a smile but on the inside her stomach was turning around. Ashley took the box out of the bag and put it on the coffee table. After putting everything ready, including the shots, Tyler took the deck of cards and searched through it. When he found the card he was looking for, he put the deck back on its place.  
>"I'll begin" he said.<br>"You know you're not supposed to search of for a card, right?" Ashley said.  
>"Yeah yeah. I'll take my punishment after this" he said with a waving hand: "I'll ask this question to Sawyer." Sawyer turned herself towards Tyler with a straight face.<br>"Sawyer," he started: "Who was your first girlfriend? And this time I want a name." Sawyer looked sideways to Lindsey, who nodded and whispered it was okay.  
>"My first girlfriend was Lindsey" Sawyer answered Tyler's question. Mouths fell open and a couple gasps were hearable.<br>"So…you" Sasha started and pointed to Sawyer: "were together…with her." Now pointing to Lindsey.  
>"Yeah" Sawyer nodded.<br>"I definitively didn't see that one coming" Sasha said, throwing both hands in the air. According to the looks on Ian's, Keegan's and Tyler's face, they didn't either. When Keegan looked at Troian, who was just smiling from excitement he said: "Seems like you did see this coming…"  
>"Yeah, I totally did... And Lindsey already told us that she and Sawyer were together" Troian answered with smirk while looking at Shay, Ashley and Lucy, who were sitting opposite from her.<br>"Wait, you all knew? And you didn't tell me…" Sasha said surprised.  
>"It wasn't really up to us to tell you" Shay replied. Sasha now turned herself to Lindsey, who interrupted Sasha to explain: "It doesn't matter why I didn't tell you earlier. What does matter is that you all know now and that I finally completely except myself for who I am and for who I love." This speech made Sawyer's heart take a jump. It wouldn't surprise her if she was blushing after hearing her girlfriend sound so confident. Sawyer was just so incredibly proud of her. And at the looks of it so were her friends.<br>The touching moment got interrupted by the buzzer.  
>"I'll go" Sawyer said and stood up from her place next to Lindsey. When she answered the intercom phone she heard the pizza delivery guy. She pressed the button to buzz him in and waited by the door. She looked over to the couch while waiting and saw Lindsey talking to her friends. She couldn't really hear what they were saying, but it sounded like Lindsey was explaining a little more about what happened between them, in the past and now. A knock on the door sounded and Sawyer opened it. She took the pizza boxes and gave the guy the money with a little tip.<br>"Pizza time" Sawyer announced when she walked to the kitchen to put the boxes on the countertop. The group stood up from their places and took a plate from the table while Sawyer, Lindsey and Shay put the boxes open on the counter.  
>"Is there a hawaii?" Ian asked.<br>"Yeah here" Shay answered. They all took a slice and went back to the living room with their plate and a drink. During eating their pizza Lindsey had put on a film. _You again_, a comedy with Kristen Bell, Jamie Lee Curtis and Betty White. After the movie, it didn't take long before Keegan asked if he could play Sawyer's guitar. Sawyer agreed. It reduced the chance that she would have to play. Keegan, Troian, Lucy, Sasha and even Ian played and sang a song too, but then Lucy passed the guitar to Sawyer.  
>"Here" Lucy said: "Now it's your turn."<br>"You play?" Keegan asked.  
>"Yeah a little…" Sawyer answered nervous.<br>"A little…?" Lucy said louder than she should have: "She's incredible and her voice is amazing!" It made Sawyer blush.  
>"Well then, let's hear that amazing voice" Ashely said excited.<br>"I don't know…" Sawyer replied. Lindsey took her girlfriend by the hand and dragged her away to the hallway to her bedroom. "We'll be right back" she said. In the hallway they spoke with a quieter voice.  
>"I can't do this" Sawyer said with fear in her eyes.<br>"It's okay. Calm down…and breath." Sawyer took a deep breath. "I know it's scary but think of this being the second step to overcome your stage fright."  
>"I don't know…There are four musicians in that room who are amazing."<br>"No there aren't." Sawyer looked confused. "There are five amazing musicians in that room."  
>"Wait there's a fifth? Who?"<br>"You, dummy." Sawyer was surprised to hear that answer.  
>"You can do this. Just play a song you love and everything will be fine." Sawyer sighed. She took another deep breath and then walked back into the living room with Lindsey behind her. At the couch she asked for her guitar.<br>"Are you sure. You don't have to if you don't want to" Lucy said.  
>"Please give me my guitar…before I changed my mind" Sawyer replied. Lucy handed over the guitar and Sawyer sat back down. Lindsey stayed standing behind the couch where Shay, Ashley and Keegan where sitting on. Sawyer wanted to start playing but she stopped. She looked up at Lindsey and said with a panicked face: "I don't know what to play."<br>"Why don't you play _Jonah_" Lindsey suggested. Sawyer looked surprised at Lindsey.  
>"You remember that song?" She asked.<br>"Yeah, of course."  
>"What is <em>Jonah<em>?" Troian asked.  
>"Euhm…it's one of the first song I wrote in high school, when my dad just left" Sawyer answered but still looking at Lindsey.<br>"Well, let's hear it then" Tyler encouraged.  
>"Okay…" Sawyer agreed and she rubbed her hands. She placed her fingers on the strings and started strumming on her guitar. After the first couple notes, Sawyer felt her nerves fall away gradually. When she started singing, it was like nothing existed around her anymore and she just forgot about her surroundings, accept for Lindsey. She gave Sawyer strength to keep playing and enjoy her music.<p>

Sawyer let the last note sound and slowly looked up again. She saw eight people staring at her with big eyes and an open mouth from astonishment, and one person looking at her with a big smile and twinkling proud eyes. That person was Lindsey and it were those eyes Sawyer got drown to.  
>"Okay…" Lucy broke the silence: "I knew you could play the guitar but this was unbelievable. How can you even play like that?!"<br>"That…was awesome!" Tyler said excited. Sawyer smiled, she was proud at herself and she owed it all to Lindsey, her wonderful and amazing girlfriend. Suddenly Sawyer's phone rang. She excused herself and answered her phone in the kitchen.  
>"Hello" Sawyer said.<br>"Hey Sawyer, it's TJ"  
>"Oh hi. Something wrong?"<br>"No…Why would you think something is wrong?"  
>"Because you call me on a Saturday evening."<br>"Oh right…No, nothing is wrong. I actually have some good news. Is Lucy there with you perhaps?"  
>"Yeah, she is."<br>"Well, I give you the pleasure to tell her, her album is ready for the markets."  
>"That's awesome!" Everyone in the living room looked at Sawyer, wondering what the excitement was about.<br>"Yeah sure, I'll tell her. Thanks. Yeah, bye." And Sawyer hung up.  
>"What's all the fuss about?" Shay asked, followed by Lindsey: "Who was it?"<br>"That was TJ" Sawyer said towards Lucy.  
>"Wait, TJ? Our TJ?" Lucy asked confused.<br>"Who is TJ?" Sasha asked.  
>"He's my producer" Lucy answered.<br>"He said that I could give you some good news" Sawyer said: "Your album is completely ready to hit the markets!"  
>"Really?... Really?!" Lucy jumped from her place and ran to Sawyer to give her a hug: "Oh my god! This is amazing!" Everyone clapped in their hands and congratulated their friend.<br>"Okay guys, we have something to celebrate" Ashley said and raised her glass. The others followed her.  
>"To Lucy!" Ian said. And the other copied her: "To Lucy!" And they put their glasses even higher in the air.<p>

**The song Sawyer plays on her guitar is a song I found on youtube. It's written by a teenage boy named Graham Stookey. If you like to hear it, you can find it with the link below.  
>watch?v=YVQVoQwYrtw<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Sawyer was standing behind a long light-grey curtain. From the other side of it, she could hear people cheering and calling her name. Then a men, completely dressed in black with a clipboard in his hands and a headset on his ears, came running towards her and pushed her through the curtains. Now Sawyer stood on a bright stage with the spotlights on her. She couldn't see the audience because of the lights but she could hear them. When Sawyer looked to her left, she saw Lindsey and Caillee standing next to each other, giving her two thumbs-up. Music started to play and it wasn't until then that Sawyer noticed the strange clothes she was wearing. She recognized them from somewhere. Then it hit her. She was wearing her costume from the school musical in her senior year. Sawyer's heart started beating really fast. She wanted to start singing but she couldn't. Her voice didn't make a sound. One by one people started laughing and pointing at her. When she looked back at Lindsey and Caillee, she could see them do the same. On the other side of the stage Sawyer saw Lucy, Troian, Shay, Ashley, Keegan, Ian and Tyler. They were all laughing too. Sawyer's heart started beating even faster and she was breathing heavy. It felt like it got harder and harder to breath, that someone was choking her. Sawyer took a step back, and another and another. She felt the curtains against her back but when she wanted to go through them, to get of stage, she felt a cold stone wall behind it. She couldn't get of stage, she couldn't run away. The laughing from the people around her got louder and louder. Sawyer covered her ears and screamed.

With a shock Sawyer woke up. She sat straight, covered in sweat and breathing fast and heavy, just like in her dream.  
>"It was just a dream…it was just a dream" Sawyer whispered to herself to calm herself down. She released a deep sigh and could breathe a little slower after a couple seconds. She looked around and recognized her own bedroom by the curtains, the closet and of course her piano. Then her eyes fell on alarm clock and 03:00 was showing on the display in red shining letters. Another sigh. Sawyer was sitting at the right side of her bed and next to her she saw Lindsey lying peaceful, still sleeping. Silently, Sawyer crawled out of bed and walked out of her room. She went to the bathroom to throw some cold water in her face. After freshening up a bit, Sawyer went back to her room but before she crawled back into bed she undressed herself and threw her damp pajama pants and shirt into the laundry basket. She chose another shirt out of her closet and put it over her head. It was pretty long so she decided not to put on any pajama pants. As silent as she had crawled out of bed, she crawled back in. Lindsey moaned but didn't wake up. She just wiggled around a little. Now Lindsey was lying with her back to Sawyer, so Sawyer spooned her and put her arm over Lindsey. She placed a soft kiss on Lindsey's cheek and laid down her head on her pillow. Sawyer's mind traveled back to the night before. She and Lindsey had visited Sawyer's mom and had dinner with her. Her mom had interrogated Lindsey the hole evening. Luckily Lindsey didn't mind. She knew Sawyer's mom was really involved in Sawyer's life because Sawyer was the only family she had anymore. Sawyer's dad left when Sawyer was fifteen and Sawyer didn't have any brothers or sisters. She didn't have siblings of her own either and her parents died when Sawyer was just seven years old. But they were still very present in Sawyer's childhood house. There were pictures of them everywhere. Sawyer herselfs was also found on many of these photos. There were even some photos with Sawyer and her dad, even though they haven't had contact with him ever since he left. Now Sawyer's mind traveled back to the time she was fifteen, just a couple months before her dad disappeared from her life. She thought about the day she and her dad were asked to play at the wedding of one of his friends. They were standing on stage with both a guitar in their hands. Her dad with his Gibson and she with her acoustic guitar. It felt so good to stand on stage with him, Sawyer really enjoyed it and she knew her dad loved it too. That's one of the reason Sawyer still didn't understand why he left without a proper goodbye. Suddenly a memory flash from the dream that had woken her up, raised through her mind. She saw the audience standing in front of her and Sawyer recognized her father standing in the crowd. Or at least she thought it was him. A deep sigh. Sawyer's eyelids were feeling heavy, so she decide to give in. It didn't take long before she was fast asleep again, with Lindsey still in her arms.<p>

Six hours later, Sawyer woke up again. This time she woke up gently, feeling soft lips touching her face. On her forehead, her cheek, her noise…her lips. She took a deep breath and slowly opened her eyes. At first she only saw a dim silhouette hanging over her. The silhouette gradually changed into Lindsey, who had a sweet smile under her twinkling eyes.  
>"Good morning" Lindsey said.<br>"Morning" Sawyer replied and took another deep breath while stretching her arms. She sat up straight when Lindsey was already getting out of bed and started putting on her clothes. With a heavy head Sawyer found the strength to get out of bed too.  
>"Hey, didn't you wear something else last night, when we went to bed?" Lindsey asked, noticing the different T-shirt Sawyer was wearing. Sawyer looked down.<br>"Yeah, I was" Sawyer replied, not explaining more because she didn't want to worry Lindsey. But of course her girlfriend was curious.  
>"Why did you change?" Lindsey asked.<br>"It was just a little clammy when I woke up in the middle of the night, so I changed it" Sawyer said, avoiding eye contact and raising her shoulders, like nothing big happened. She pulled the shirt over her head and put on her pants.  
>"Hey Sawyer," Lindsey was now standing next to her and had laid a hand on Sawyer's shoulder: "Are you okay? You look a little…"<br>"Yeah I'm fine" Sawyer interrupted Lindsey and turned herself towards her girlfriend: "Just didn't really sleep that much." Sawyer pressed her lips against Lindsey's cheek to reassure her girlfriend. Lindsey accepted the kiss but she had the feeling there was more then what Sawyer was telling her.  
>"Want some breakfast?" Sawyer asked while walking towards the door.<br>"Yeah sure…" Lindsey answered with a anxious feeling in her belly. She followed Sawyer out of the room, but instead of going to the kitchen like her girlfriend, Lindsey went to the bathroom. She hoped to find Caillee there and she was lucky. Caillee was standing in front of the mirror, trying to put her hair up with a pin.  
>"Hey Caillee, can I come in?" Lindsey asked with her head slightly through the door. Caillee turned her head and replied: "Yeah, come on in. What's up? You look a little worried." Caillee turned back to the mirror.<br>"Yeah, I kinda am. Did you notice anything this night?"  
>"Like what?"<br>"Like Sawyer getting up?" Lindsey now stood next to Caillee, who turned herself to Lindsey.  
>"No, why?" Caillee asked worried and confused.<br>"Well, I noticed she was wearing a different shirt this morning then when we went to bed yesterday. When I asked her about it, it seemed like she was trying to avoid the conversation and she just said it got clammy during the night. I don't know, maybe I'm just seeing ghost and I'm worrying about nothing but it just doesn't feel right."  
>"I think she had a nightmare again…" Caillee said.<br>"Again…What do you mean?" Lindsey asked confused.  
>"You know about her…" A sigh. "…her disorder."<br>"Yeah, I know about it…I was there when she had her first attack."  
>"Well with the medication she is taking now she's pretty stable, but she still has nightmares frequently. I have woken up from her screaming at night several times and then she is always covered with sweat. Her clothes aren't just clammy…they are wet, really really wet. She doesn't like to talk about it, but I know it bothers her." Lindsey listened carefully and she felt bad for what Sawyer had to go through. Almost ten years ago, when she and Lindsey were still just friends, Sawyer had her first anxiety attack. The attack got triggered by her father leaving her and her mom behind. From that moment on, Sawyer got attacks more frequently. Her mom was really worried and finally could convince her daughter to go with her to a doctor. The doctor did all these different test and then was able to diagnose her with anxiety disorder. Sawyer had to take medication that helped her calm down and go to therapy once a week. It really helped. She had some fall backs a couple times, like when Lindsey had left her and at the musical in her senior year of high school, but she was pretty stable. That didn't take away she didn't have these little anxieties that weren't so bad to handle, but Sawyer always tried to put them away and she pretend they weren't happening, she didn't talk about it. That's what triggered the nightmares. Sawyer wasn't going to a psychiatrist regular anymore so she didn't talk about these things. But sometimes the nightmares were really taking over her nights so Sawyer didn't get any sleep. At those times, Caillee usually could convince her roommate to go to some therapy sessions. When Sawyer felt better again, she stopped going to the sessions because she didn't felt like she needed it anymore. Her psychiatrist had tried to help Sawyer find someone she could talk to at all times, someone she felt safe with. Sawyer had told her psychiatrist about Lindsey, that she was the one Sawyer told everything to in high school. But when Lindsey moved away, Sawyer's special person was gone and she didn't find anyone else to talk to like she could with Lindsey. Caillee was great, she was Sawyer's best friend, but Sawyer never felt that special bond with her. That special connection that makes you feel like whatever you tell that person, she will listen to it like it's the most important thing in the world, like nothing else matters anymore.<br>After Caillee was finished with her story, Lindsey stared forward with an open mouth and feeling guilty. She didn't know that she had been such an important person in Sawyer's life. Lindsey wished she could be that person again, she wanted to help her girlfriend and the only way she could do that was listen to her. But for that to happen, Sawyer needed to start thrusting Lindsey completely again. Lindsey understood that it needed time but she was willing do anything for it.

"Hey Lindsey, are in here?" Sawyer asked while she walked into the bathroom. She stopped abruptly from surprise: "Oh…What's going on?" Lindsey was trying to think of an excuse to why she and Caillee were in the bathroom together, but then she thought that by doing that she would never gain Sawyer's thrust. So Lindsey decide to tell the truth.  
>"I wanted to ask Caillee if she knew something more about why you would have such a bad night" Lindsey explained: "She told me about the nightmares and a bit about what happened when I wasn't there for you." Sawyer listened very serious to Lindsey, with a tense face. "I know I shouldn't have gone behind your back but I was just really worried about you." Sawyer's tense face relaxed a bit. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't there for you when you needed me…" Lindsey took a step forward and Sawyer lowered her head. "…and I know it's gonna take time for you to thrust me again like you use to did. I just hope you want to give me another chance…" Lindsey was now standing not more than a foot away from Sawyer. Sawyer took a deep breath, looked up into Lindsey's eyes and took that one last step forward to close up the space between them. She wrapped her arms around her girlfriend and gave Lindsey a tight hug. Lindsey did the same and felt relieved. Sawyer's hug tightened a bit more. A mix of feelings went through her and she couldn't really make out which ones it were, but she did know she felt grateful. Grateful for having such wonderful people in her life who were willing to do a lot for her. Sawyer started forward with not much emotion in her eyes. She took another deep breath, sighed and let her head rest on Lindsey's shoulder, who planted a soft kiss on her head.<p> 


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Sunbeams fell on Sawyer's face when she gradually woke up, but without opening her eyes yet. She didn't understand how it was possible that those sunbeams were shining on her because the only window in Lindsey's room was located at the head of the bed. When she finally opened her eyes she saw a mirror standing on the opposite side of the room where sunbeams reflected on. Sawyer rolled over to her left sight and found Lindsey lying next to her. She was still asleep but that wouldn't be for long. Just a couple more minutes before the alarm clock was going to wake her up. Sawyer gently pressed a kiss on her girlfriends cheek and then got out of bed. Just when Sawyer had left the room she heard Lindsey's alarm ringing, followed by an annoyed groan. Arrived at the kitchen, she poured water in the coffee machine and pressed the button on top of it. Then she started setting up the table. When the coffee was finished she poured it in two cups and handed one over to Lindsey, who just walked in the room.  
>"Mmmmh…coffee. Just what I need" Lindsey said satisfied and they both took place at the table.<br>"Want some cereal?" Sawyer asked.  
>"Yes please" Lindsey answered, so Sawyer poured some cereal in a big blue bowl. "So, what are your plans for today?" Lindsey asked.<br>"I don't really have anything planned" Sawyer answered. Now that Lucy's album was completely finished, Sawyer had nothing to do and so did TJ. They only needed to meet up once more to decide which songs Lucy was going to sing on her release party, but they already decide to do that on Wednesday afternoon and it was Monday now. But other than that, TJ and Sawyer could only wait for the company to call to assign them to another job. Maybe next time Sawyer would be working on a movie. That definitively sounded interesting.  
>"What about you?" Sawyer now asked.<br>"Well I have to be on set in an hour and a half and I actually have to stay probably till the end."  
>"Big scenes?"<br>"Not really, just a lot of little ones." Sawyer nodded. "Hey, maybe I can ask if you can come by on set? You know, if you want to" Lindsey suggested.  
>"Yeah, that sounds great" Sawyer said excited.<br>"I'll call Marlene right away."  
>When Lindsey finished her call with Marlene, she had a big excited smile on her face.<br>"Let me guess" Sawyer said: "She's letting me on the set?"  
>"YES!" Lindsey replied with a jump in the air and a hug.<p>

An hour later, Sawyer and Lindsey arrived on the Pretty little liars set. They first went to Lindsey's trailer to put away their bags. Lindsey also found her clothes she would wear for her first scene. Before she put on her clothes she went to the hair and make-up trailer. Lindsey took place next to Shay who was already there and Sawyer decided to wait outside and enjoy the morning sun.  
>"Hey Sawyer!" It was Troian calling her. She came running over to the trailer with her sunglasses on her head and a cup of coffee in her hand.<br>"What are you doing here?" she asked.  
>"Lindsey invited me to come visit the set" Sawyer replied.<br>"Is she in here?" Troian asked, pointing at the hair and make-up trailer. Sawyer nodded.  
>"Hey do you even watch PLL?"<br>"Well…I started watching it when the show premiered but when Lindsey first appeared on it, I kinda stopped. Not because I didn't like the show or anything…Just because, you know…"  
>"Mmh…" Troian nodded to show Sawyer she understood. "Well now that you're back together, you can start watching again" Troian said with a smirk.<br>"Well I actually did start again."  
>"Which season?"<br>"I'm almost at the end of season 2."  
>"Wow, than today is gonna be one big spoiler for you."<br>"Not really. Lindsey was too excited about the things that had happened on set and has told a lot of what happened during the other season." The girls laughed. Behind them the trailer door opened and Lindsey and Shay walked out.  
>"Good morning ladies" Shay greeted them.<br>"Ready for another day?" Troian directed her question to Lindsey and Shay.  
>"Sure am" Lindsey replied with a smile, looking at her girlfriend who smiled back.<br>The four of them walked over to the school set, where the first scene of the day would take place. Marlene was already busy with ordering people around.  
>"Hey Marlene" Troian greeted her with a smile and Marlene came closer.<br>"Good morning girls." Then she turned to Sawyer. "So you are the girl who has our Lindsey all rainbows and butterflies…" Sawyer looked confused to Lindsey.  
>"I have her what?..."<br>"Let's just say we've never seen her so happy" Shay said with a smirk and a poke against Lindsey. Lindsey, who had red cheeks now, produced a somewhat embarrassed laugh.  
>"Marlene, this is Sawyer. Sawyer, this is Marlene" Lindsey introduced them.<br>"It's nice to meet you" Sawyer said, reaching out her hand. Marlene accepted the handshake.  
>"It's nice to meet you too. Okay, come on girls. You get in position now. We're first gonna go through the scene as a rehearsal" Marlene said: "Sawyer you can come stand along me."<br>The rest of the day, Sawyer enjoyed watching the scene rehearsals, the filming and of course the bloopers. Marlene had also let Sawyer follow along the sound director, which she found very interesting. During their lunch break, Sawyer had caught up with the guys and the other girls. Sawyer especially liked talking to Troian. She was very nice and kind. And for some reason it clicked between them. Troian also shared a passion for music.  
>Later that day, Marlene asked the actors and a couple stage people to come together in the room where they would do their first read-through of a new script. Only this time it wasn't for a new script. It was about finding music for a certain scene, and a very important one it seemed. Luckily Marlene didn't mind Sawyer being in the room too.<br>"Okay people, we still need some music to put on the background for Allison's return to school scene. There have been made some suggestions, but we haven't been able to find the right one" Marlene started: "Normally it's the producers team who searches the music but for some reason this scene is hard to find a song for. Does anyone has some new suggestions?" The room stayed quiet until Lucy spoke: "Maybe you should play the scene again. Saywer is really good with music, maybe she knows a song that fits." Sawyer was caught by surprise.  
>"I'd like that idea. What do you say Sawyer?" Marlene asked.<br>"Sure, I'll give it a shot" Sawyer answered a bit uncertain, excited for the opportunity but also scared for failure. Marlene nodded to a guy sitting a couple seats to the right from her. The guy pressed a couple buttons on his computer and the scene from Allison's return to school played on the rolled out screen. Sawyer watched carefully and before the scene was over an idea already popped into her head. When the scene did end, the guy behind the computer paused the video and all eyes were on Sawyer.  
>"I may have an idea…" Sawyer was able to bring out.<br>"Great" Marlene set excited: "Let's hear it." A quick flash of fear raised through Sawyers body. Lindsey, who had noticed the sudden change in her girlfriends eyes, came closer. Sawyer whispered in Lindsey's ear which song had popped into her mind.  
>"That's it! I can't believe I haven't thought about it!" Lindsey said excited.<br>"Care to fill us in with your idea?" Lucy asked. Sawyer nodded. She took out her phone and scrolled through a playlist, pressed play and put the volume up. A voice started singing accompanied by the sound of a piano. After the song ended Ashely was the first one to bring out what she thought about the song.  
>"That song is amazing!" she said with a big smile on her face.<br>"Guys…I think we found our song!" Marlene announced: "Just one question, Sawyer. Who wrote the song? We do need to get permission to use it."  
>"Well…actually, I wrote it" Sawyer answered shy. Mouths fell open.<br>"You…wrote that song?" Lucy asked with big eyes. Sawyer nodded.  
>"Well that's it. I'm need to get signed as an artist yourself, no hiding behind the buttons anymore for you" Lucy said decisive. And that's what happened, sort of. After giving Hollywood records a CD with a couple songs she wrote, Sawyer got signed as a songwriter. She did started to like performing for small groups again but she wasn't quite there yet to perform on real stages. Sawyer was happy with the new contract. It was already more than she'd ever hoped for.<p>

**The song I'm referring to 'Begin again' by Rachel platten, is the actual song used for the scene when Allison returns to Rosewood high school. **


End file.
